Half Life
by deredith4510
Summary: They were young and in love and decided it was best for their situation that they part ways. They decided it might be best to spend time apart to find themselves, but in the end maybe they found each other.
1. Ten O Clock

Derek sighed as he entered his New York apartment. New York winters were harsh and that wasn't making his day any better. Residency was easier than being an intern but being in charge of interns and fixing their mistakes sometimes made him crazy. He hung his coat on the coat rack before proceeding to the kitchen. He hit the lights on and saw the stale apartment. His girlfriend, or ex girlfriend now had moved in and made his comfy home into a stale modern loft.

Today had been rough, he lost two patients, his interns were up to something he couldn't' quite figure out and on top of that his ex girlfriend was being a pain and not leaving him alone. He shook the rain off his hair as he hung up his keys before sitting down at the counter. He looked at the clock and smiled 9:45pm a quarter until 10 and smiled. There was one thing that always helped him through the day regardless of how much the day sucked. He logged onto his Facebook to kill some time, browsing through his news feed and reading up on what was happening on the other coast of the country. He was busied by his news feed that he didn't even notice the time until his video chat starting ringing. Derek smiled before hitting accept and immediately smiling when he saw blue eyes much like his own on his screen.

"Hey princess" Derek smiled

"Daddy Daddy guess what" Said the voice behind the screen


	2. Here Comes the Sun

**Here Comes the Sun- The Beatles **

_Here comes the sun doo doo doo doo_

_Here comes the sun, and I say_

_It's alright..._

* * *

"Hey princess" Derek smiled

"Daddy Daddy guess what" Said the voice behind the screen

" I went to school!" the little girl shouted and jumped making her crown fall off her head. Derek chuckled as he saw his daughter's princess outfit

"Did you wear that to school Princess Emma?" Derek chuckled

"Daddy you're silly. I wanted to but mommy said that we don't wear these clothes to school" she giggled.

That laugh, the infectious laugh was just like her mothers. Since the day she was born everybody said she was the spitting image of Derek. His daughter had bright blue eyes that turned stormy during tantrums, locks of dark curly hair and smile that lit up a room. Luckily she inherited her mother's nose. While she may have looked like him, her personality mirrored her mother. She strong willed and determined.

"Did you have fun" Derek asked

"YES! Mommy said I get to back tomorrow!" Emma shouted in excitement

Derek continued to talk with his daughter, asking what she did and wanting to know the details of her day. The past year and a half been tough not being physically there for her day-to-day life. Yes they talked everyday but he missed being there, he hoped so much to be there for her first day of Pre-K to be the dad that walked his little girl in on the first day.

"Alright Emma it's time for bed" He heard in the background as Meredith came into the view of the web cam

"But mommy…" Emma protested

"Emma, you've been talking to daddy for two hours it's nine o'clock and you need to get to bed. You have school tomorrow and so does mommy plus It' midnight where Daddy lives and he has to work in the morning." She said lifting up the little girl from the chair and setting her on feet "now go get changed for bed and I will meet you to tuck you in when I'm done talking to Daddy" Meredith said kissing the top of Emma's head before the little girl reluctantly nodded

"Can Daddy sing to me tonight?" Emma asked as Meredith looked at the screen for confirmation

"Of course Princess, I'm sorry I've missed a few nights, Daddy's been working the night shifts" Derek said in response

"Yay!" Emma shouted as she went to her room

"How was your day?" Derek asked

"Tiring, 2 more weeks and I can relax for a few weeks," Meredith said sighing. "But surprisingly Emma was a bit reluctant to go to school this morning but after promising after school ice cream she ran off into the room" she laughed

"That's my girl" Derek chuckled "You ready for a break aren't you"

"I'm a single mom who is in medical school, I'm exhausted. Finals are coming up and I just feel so overwhelmed. With me studying extra and me leaving Emma at the daycare a little more I hope she doesn't feel like I'm neglecting her"

"Mer you're a great mother. Emma knows she's loved. I went to my moms house this morning before work and got all my study cards and put them in a box and express shipped them so they should be at your door this week" Derek said "Just think about it, get through finals and then you and Emma will be in New York. You'll be spending Thanksgiving and Christmas in the heart of America" Derek chuckled "how are you liking the new testing schedule.

"It's weird being off starting Thanksgiving but in a good way it's better than last year when we had our midterm before Thanksgiving and having finals right before Christmas. But at the same time since we start only a bit earlier I feel like there's more crammed onto the exams but I think it'll be worth it." Meredith explained "Speaking of which I booked our tickets and we should get there the Monday of Thanksgiving week"

"I'll still be working my normal schedule but I did get the early Thanksgiving shift so I should be off by Dinner and after promising to work New Years Eve and Day I got Christmas Day off." Derek said happily "It also helps that I told my boss that my daughter will be in town"

"Using our daughter" Meredith laughed shaking her head "So how was your day?"

"My interns screwed up" Derek sighed "And on top of thing Tiffany is driving me nuts."

"I thought you guys broke up like a month ago" Meredith said confused

"We did, she still wants to work things out but I just didn't see a future with us and with Emma I don't want to bring anybody into the picture I don't see a future with" Derek sighed

"Well it's 9:30 Emma needs to get to bed and I need to study go grab your guitar" Meredith said getting up and picking up the laptop before walking down the hall to their daughter's room "Ready for bed Miss Emma" she said walking into the room

"Yes mommy" Emma smiled pulling her blanket onto the bed as Meredith laid next to her propping up the laptop as Derek began to strum his guitar as he began to sing what Emma called her Daddy song.

"Here comes the sun doo doo doo doo, here comes the sun" Derek sang softly…

* * *

_Flashback_

_Derek never knew he could love a person so much as he held his newborn daughter in his arms. Their situation wasn't ideal, Meredith was only 19 and he was in his last years of medical school when they had fallen pregnant. They had been together a little over a year. Meredith had finished high school early with honors and was finishing her undergrad studies and was already accepted into medical schools across the country. They knew the odds were against them but they both couldn't stand the thought of giving up their baby, let alone an abortion. So they both sat down with the reality of becoming young parents who were in school. they were scared but the moment they laid eyes on their little girl they were head over heels in love with her and determined to make sure she had the best life they could provide for her._

_So here he stood in the room he and Meredith shared, as Meredith was asleep. While he helped out as much as he could by waking up when Meredith did when Emma needed her, Meredith's body was exhausted. He heard the baby fussing and she wasn't wet and it wasn't feeding time and in efforts to let Meredith rest he gently scooped up his little girl and began to rock her back in fourth._

_"Look little one the sun is coming up" he cooed softly "How about a song little one. Here come's the song doo doo doo doo. Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright…"_

* * *

Present Day

Derek climbed into bed, sleep was coming to him quickly. His night routine with Emma lasted a bit longer than usual and he had an earlier shift in the morning, but it was worth it. He cherished every moment he could with Emma even if it was through the internet. He took off his watch and set it on his bed side table before looking at the frame that sat on top of it and smiled. Emma was a little over a year old when Derek's mother insisted on getting the family together for a reunion and have a big family picture day. Emma was a little over a year and Meredith and Derek were no longer together. They were still great friends and though Meredith was hesitant to come, Derek made sure she knew that even though they weren't an item that she was a part of the family. Derek sighed as he turned out the lamp and settled into bed with his mind wandering on how much has changed in the past few years and thinking about how he had been a carefree man madly in love with Meredith Grey a few years ago to where he was now...

* * *

_Flashback_

_"We can't keep doing this" Meredith sighed as she sat on the edge of the bed "It's not good for us and it's not good for Emma"_

_"I know" Derek sighed. Emma was 9 months old and their world had been flipped upside down. Derek was a first year intern and Meredith had just started Medical School. While Meredith has gotten into prestigious schools Derek got an amazing internship at Seattle Grace. After countless discussions Meredith decided to go to Washington University College of Medicine. With Derek being a first year intern, Meredith being a full time medical student and both of them parenting a young child they found themselves arguing a lot lately._

_"We made a promise" Meredith whispered "That we had to put Emma first. I don't want us to continue on like this. It's not healthy for us and I'm scared if we keep hanging on we'll end up hating each other and being the split up parents that communicate through their child" she said letting a tear escape her eye_

_"Oh Mer" Derek said kneeling done and wiping her tear understanding her fear of a broken household_

_"I can't do that to her" Meredith whispered "We fight all the time and I love Emma to death but with her and school taking up most of my time I can't fight and worry about us"_

_"I know" Derek said sitting on the bed knowing where this was going_

_"I think it's just best for right now if there is no us" Meredith said almost inaudible_

_"I think so too" _

* * *

Present Day

As much as the break up hurt both of them it was for the best. Derek moved into an apartment a few floors up and they were great parents to Emma even without being together. Fast-forward three years and Meredith was in the middle of medical school and he was a second year surgical resident in New York. They were happy, they weren't the all American family with the white picket fence and a dog but they were a family. Emma knew she had two loving parents and Derek was involved as much as he could be in Emma's life even though he lived on the other coast. The coastal move hadn't been an easy decision. He was offered residency in Seattle but New York had a greater offer. Derek had been willing to settle for Seattle Grace but it was Meredith who encouraged him to take the offer in New York. Over the years they had become great friends, talking to each other about things other than Emma. Since their split they had both dated a few people, but nothing was ever serious. They both knew that who ever they decided to pursue relationships with had to be someone who would stick around. Meredith went on a few dates but they never really went anywhere, Derek had a few relationships but nothing to the point of introducing Emma. For both of them she was always the number one priority and they always made their decisions based off how it would affect their daughter.

_Little darling, the smiles returning to the faces_  
_Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here_  
_Here comes the sun_  
_Here comes the sun, and I say_  
_It's all right_

* * *

I know this is a bit jumpy but it all ties together later on as we get more pieces of history. Please let me know what you think.


	3. Author's Note

I have held my tongue long enough. If you do not like this story there is no need to keep reading the chapters and sending hateful reviews. Send it once and I get it. If you do not like my writing leave a review once and move on with life, don't read anymore of my writing. I have had some discouraging reviews saying I am a shame to Greys Anatomy. Oddly enough this story has a happy ending but it follows the lives of Meredith and Derek. Life isn't always easy and in all relationships there are ups and downs. I do not want to reveal so much of my story line for this story but there is a happy ending. One review commented how I love to write about cheating... I wrote one experimental story involving adultery just because I thought it would be nice to see a different kind of Derek. Obviously as much praise as I got writing outside of the comfort zone I had enough negative feedback that I decided the audience I was reaching wasn't ready to explore the down fall of a man they have propped on a pedestal and stopped the story and ended up deleting it because the same person kept making anonymous comments that essentially the same. The summary of this story

They were young and in love and decided it was best for their situation that they part ways. They decided it might be best to spend time apart to find themselves, but in the end maybe they found each other.

A theme that you will find in this story includes self growth and discovery. I write from personal experience. Sometimes as we grow up we look back and think about how much personal growth we have had through our life experiments, sometimes you look back and see a totally different person than who you currently and sometimes it's for the better.

Now I know some of you will say that by writing I make myself open to criticism. I am all for the criticism but when you are making short handed assumptions (obvious you didn't even read into the story) or making the same comment of "this sucks" it just gets redundant and I end up asking myself why are they still reading. This is fanfiction read at your own will. It's not the required novel for your graduate term paper.

And for the record English is not my native language for those of you who like to criticize my english.


	4. The Scientist

**The Scientist**

_Nobody Said it you be easy_

_Nobody said it would be this hard_

A few weeks later…

Derek was worried. It was almost 11 and Meredith hadn't chatted him in. He tried her cell phone and got nothing, he also rang her video call and still nothing. He was about to call Christina, Meredith's best friend when a video call popped up on his screen and he felt relief.

"Hey Mer" Derek smiled only to frown when he saw Meredith's appearance. It was obvious she was tired but he could tell she had been crying "Oh Mer what's wrong" Derek asked concerned

"I'm a terrible mother" she cried, "Emma is upset and I just don't know…" She began to ramble

"Mer, Mer slow down. Take a deep breath" Derek said trying to calm her down "Tell me what happened"

"First Emma was being difficult this morning so it took us forever to get out the door. After dropping her off I got a ticket for speeding to school. I was already late so I got a horrible parking spot. While trying to rush into class I spill my coffee all over my shirt, of course I was wearing white. The professor points be out and everybody was looking at poor disheveled Meredith. As if that was enough I got my term paper back I made a B that means I'm going to need an A plus on the final to pull off an A in the class. I pick up Emma and we get home and I give her a snack and we both sit down at the table so I could study and she can do her pre school take home papers. She spills her juice on the table and it soaks all my study papers. She started to cry and I told her it was okay but she wouldn't calm down. She eventually did when I put on a movie. We had dinner and I don't know what it is lately but she's been acting out. Tonight when I told her I couldn't play tea party she said that I didn't like playing with her, that all the other mommies come to pre school and visit but I haven't. I felt so bad Derek. I think I need to just drop this semester…"

"No" Derek said firmly "Meredith you are not stopping school. This is the tough part. I know it sucks but you can't stop school Meredith. You are a great mother and Emma doesn't quite understand yet but when she's older she is going to realize how much you love her because of all things you had to juggle to make sure she had a secure future. I'll have a talk with Emma, help her understand things. Meredith you are one of the brightest people I know and you can make an A in that class." He said watching her wipe the tears off with a kleenex wanting nothing more than to be in Seattle to comfort her and help her through some of the toughest times of medical school just as she did for him when he was struggling being a full time surgical intern while being a parent to a young infant.

* * *

_Flashback_

_Derek groaned as the cries of a baby woke him up._

_"Make her stop" Derek groaned into his pillow as he heard the cries get louder and closer_

_"I'm trying" Meredith snapped_

_"take her back in the other room" he snapped back "I'm tired"_

_"..and I'm not?!" Meredith snapped again "I'm a full time mom and primary care taker of OUR child" she yelled regretting as soon as she did when the baby in her arms began to wail louder_

_"I help too" he said sitting up from the bed. All he wanted to do was sleep he had been working all day with a heavy trauma ER_

_"really because you are either working or asleep. I always let you nap after your shifts and take her out for a walk meanwhile I have a big exam in a few hours and I have yet to get any shut eye" Meredith said in a harsh whisper as she walked out of their bedroom and into the living room._

_Derek laid back down on the bed and ran his fingers through his hair. She was right. He knew Meredith always went out of her way to make sure he got enough rest before long shifts and got to nap after long shifts from the hospital. When he had to study up on surgeries and Emma was being fussy she always took her out for a walk so that he could have some peace. Meanwhile she had a big exam tomorrow he wasn't sure how much time she had to study and now it looks like she wasn't going to get any sleep with a fussy Emma. Emma was usually a calm baby but lately she has been fussier than ever and part of him felt like Emma sensed the tension between her parents. He sighed as he heard Meredith's voice on the baby monitor. It was shaky and it was clear she was crying and upset._

_"Hey little one, I'm sorry we scared you. You know mommy and daddy love each other and more importantly we love you. Things will get better, it might be a few years but it'll get better and one day you'll understand. Everybody thinks I'm crazy being a full time medical student and being a mommy but I wouldn't change anything for the world. You are perfect miss Emma and you are the best thing that has ever happened. Daddy is just busy, he's an intern so one day he can be a doctor a save lives, mommy wants to do that too but I'm not sure if I'll get there but I promise you regardless of what happens I'll make sure you grow up happy and safe" Meredith said softly to the baby who was drifting off to sleep_

_It broke Derek's heart to hear Meredith saying she might not make it as a doctor. She had talked about it multiple times, stopping medical school and settle for nursing or something that wasn't as rigorous so she could give Emma a secure future without suffering a long a difficult schooling while trying to parent a young child. Meredith was one of the smartest people he knew and knew she was sacrificing so much for him and their daughter. He slowly got up and padded his way to the living room and the sight he saw took his breath away. Meredith was cradling a sleeping Emma as was she. Meredith's snores filled the silent apartment and Derek little out a slight chuckle. He gently lifted Emma from her mother's embrace causing Meredith to stir and open her eyes._

_"Shhh" Derek whispered "I'm putting her back in her room and you are going to bed" he said as he reassured her. He looked at the peaceful baby in his arms. She may have been the spitting image of him but when he really looked at her he could see Meredith. He hoped she would inherit so much from her mother, her giggle, her strong will and determination, everything that Meredith different from every woman he had ever been with. The baby's eyes fluttered open as he shifted her in his arms wanting to hold her a bit more. Blue eyes met blue eyes almost as a reassurance that everything would turn out to be okay. "Here comes the sun doo doo doo doo" Derek started to softly sing rocking the baby slightly as she gently closed her eyes and drifted back into a slumber "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me Emma" he said softly as he kissed the baby's forehead before placing her in her crib. He gently closed the door before making his way to the living room chuckling at Meredith's sleeping position. She had all but rolled over onto her stomach before returning to sleep as he heard soft snores. He gently scooped her up and brought her back to their bedroom where he placed her on the bed before climbing in himself. He nestled closer to her and almost like a natural response she turned into him nestling her head on his chest._

_"I miss you" he heard her mumble._

_"I'm right here" Derek said "I promise things will get better"_

_"I'm sorry I yelled" She whispered_

_"No, you're right. Tomorrow I have the morning off, if Emma wakes you stay in bed and sleep in or study I'll watch Emma until you have to go. I'll bring her to the daycare, you focus on your test. I love you Mer, more than you will ever know" he said dropping a kiss on the top of her head_

_"I love you too" She said before drifting off to sleep._

* * *

Present Day

"Hi daddy" Emma said as she came onto the screen

"Hey princess, I heard you and mommy had a bad day" Derek said looking intently at his daughter, just like the both Meredith and himself her eyes said everything

"Mommy doesn't like to play with me anymore" Emma said quietly

"Emma Grace you know that is not true. Remember, just like you mommy has to go to school. But her school is really hard and her teacher gives her test that are really hard and if she doesn't do good he sends her to the dungeon with the dragon" Derek said

"Daddy you're silly teachers are nice" Emma giggled "Her teachers won't feed her to the dragons"

"No but Emma remember how Daddy has to live far away because he has to work that's why I can't spend time with you" Derek explained on a more serious note

"Yes" Emma nodded

"Well right the school mommy goes to is like a job so sometimes she gets busy but it doesn't mean she loves you any less. If anything it means she loves you more because she's trying to finish school early so she can spend more time with you."

"Okay Daddy" Emma said as Meredith came into the view giving him a smile acknowledging that she heard everything he told Emma

"I'm sorry for being a turn mommy" Emma said giving her mother a kiss

"Emma where did you learn that word" Meredith asked their daughter

"Aunt Christina. She said that sometimes people can act like turds" Emma said innocently "Can I have ice cream?"

"Yes baby, go wait in the kitchen. Say bye to daddy" Meredith said

"Night daddy" Emma said blowing Derek a kiss

"By Em" Derek smiled

"Thanks" Meredith breathed

"One day she'll understand. She's not even four yet but I think she kids of gets it" Derek said "You need to have some ice cream yourself. Spend tonight relaxing with Em. I found that it was good to take a break and clear your head, it makes studying easier later if you're not so high strung. Think about it, in a week in a half you guys will be here in New York"

"I cannot wait" Meredith smiled "Well I better get the princess her ice cream and perhaps sit and watch a movie with her before bed"

"You can do this Mer" Derek said reassuring her

"Thanks, goodnight" she smiled

"Night Mer" Derek said as they both signed off

They both knew this wasn't going to be easy. When Emma was born they had both discussed all their options, to continue school, have both of them stop school and find decent paying jobs, to have Meredith be a stay at home mom while Derek finished his education—they had thought of all the possibilities. But they knew the best thing in the long run was for both of them to finish their higher education and get stable well paying jobs to ensure Emma would have a stable future. They knew if was going to be tough and require a lot of sacrifices but they knew that they wanted to provide their daughter the best they could.

_I was just guessing at numbers and figures_  
_Pulling the puzzles apart_  
_Questions of science, science and progress_  
_Don't speak as loud as my heart_  
_And tell me you love me, come back and haunt me_  
_Oh and I rush to the start_  
_Running in circles, chasing our tails_  
_Coming back as we are_

* * *

Well what do you think?


	5. Avenue C

**Avenue C**

_Walkin' home and you can walk with me_

_Walkin' hand in hand on Avenue C_

_oh babe_

_And while we're walkin' we can do some talkin_

_'While the people dig us wonderin'_

* * *

She was done. A sense of relief washed over her but at the same time she knew she wouldn't be at peace until her final grade went up. The semester had been crazy, and with the new school schedule she had about two months to recover before it was back to the books for the Spring Term. But for now she was done. She got into her car and smiled as she pulled off school grounds to go pick up her daughter. Today was going to be an Emma and Mommy Day. It was lunchtime and Emma didn't know Meredith was picking her up early. Meredith had figured it'd be a good surprise.

"Mommy!" Emma shouted as she ran out of her pre-school room and into her mother's arms

"Hey there monkey" Meredith smiled lifting her up and sitting her on her hip "Thanks, see you guys soon!" Meredith said to the staff of the daycare school.

"Today was the best day ever" Emma beamed as she ate her strawberry ice cream while she held her mothers hand on the ferryboat. It was one of those few sunny days in Seattle. While it was chilly outside the sun beamed down which a great change from the cloudy Seattle rain weather. They had spent the afternoon shopping for their Holiday trip to New York, Meredith had taken Emma to the kid spa for a mommy and me manicure and pedicure. While Meredith had never been the girly girl, her daughter was all about the pink, the glitter and the big bows. Meredith swears that had to be a gene from the Shepherd family. After some shopping they walked around downtown Seattle and enjoyed the sun. Emma was constantly twirling and dancing around and after recording a clip on her phone and sending it to Derek she made a mental note to look into putting her daughter into a dance class.

"Did you have fun princess?" Meredith giggled wiping some melted ice cream off Emma's mouth

"Now you're done with school, do we get to do this everyday?!" her daughter's said excitedly as her eyes went big

"Maybe not everyday" Meredith laughed "Perhaps you can get your daddy to take you out on a few Daddy Emma days while we're visiting him" Meredith said knowing that Emma was going to be spoiled to death by Derek and his family.

"I don't think Daddy is going to get matching pink sparkle nails with me silly"

"Who knows, you've got your daddy wrapped around your little finger" Meredith replied knowing all too well that Derek would do anything to make his princess happy and to make up for lost time "Well Em time to get in the car, we're about to dock. We are going to go home, make some pizza and start packing because we are leaving for New York tomorrow"

"I get to see DADDY!" Emma shouted with a smile throwing her arms and her ice cream in the air

"Emma" Meredith laughed as the ice cream ended up in Elliot bay "I think you are excited"

"Of Course, I haven't given my Daddy a hug in years" her daughter said dramatically.

"Daddy watch this" Emma said to her dad over video chat. This was one of those days where Derek was off early and Meredith was home so that they could skype longer. Derek watched intently as his daughter threw pizza dough in the air only to have it land on Meredith's shoulder causing all of them to laugh

"Oh Em, how about tomorrow I take you and your mom out for some New York pizza? When you get here it should be about lunchtime and you can see them toss the dough" Derek laughed

"Can we mommy?" Emma said excitedly as Meredith flattened out some dough for Emma to put sauce and all her topping on

"I'm just excited to see your dad eat pizza" Meredith giggled remembering how much of a health nut Derek was.

* * *

_Flashback_

_"How do you eat this stuff?" Derek laughed as he continued to feed Meredith another slice of Pizza as they lazily watched a movie on the couch. Meredith insisted they order pizza because she hadn't had any in a few days, as much of a health nut Derek was he never could say no to her and they agreed on a vegetable pizza_

_"Hmmm but you love me, even with my different eating choices" Meredith giggled before giving him a soft kiss "I don't understand how you eat that crap you call cereal everyday, coco puffs for the win!" Meredith giggled_

* * *

Present Day

"Alright so we can run to a store after lunch right?" Meredith asked Derek on the phone later that evening as she finished up packing for her and Emma. Packing for a month long trip was hard, as Meredith continued to walk through their daily routine to make sure she wasn't missing anything major. "I'll probably have to get us some clothes there just because I don't' want to pay for more than two bags" Meredith sighed

"I don't' know why you won't let me just pay for the flight Mer" Derek said. He had been insisting that he be the one to pay for their travel knowing the financial struggle it was to be a medical student. While Meredith wasn't on the ramen noodle staple diet, he knew that she was constantly trying to get Emma involved with activities, which meant money. Meredith worked a but on the weekends at a clinic for experience and some extra cash, that along with inheritance from her mother and stipend money from her undergraduate studies was enough to support herself and Emma. Derek honestly believed if he didn't transfer money into her account she wouldn't even ask him for any type of child support. They had nothing formal but Derek monthly sent Meredith money to help cover the cost of everything for Emma. Derek knew from that lump sum she out some away into a fund for Emma.

"Because Derek, it's not your responsibility" Meredith said rolling her eyes

"Fine, you win but while you are here I will pay for everything else" He said adamantly

"In that case I need a whole new wardrobe, maybe half the diamonds in New York City and a helicopter." Meredith giggled

"Very funny Meredith. I should be there at the airport before you land unless some trauma comes in, then my mom should be there. Should I make a scene and bring dozens of roses and balloons, a sign and a marching band to greet you?"

"Don't you dare Derek Christopher Shepherd" Meredith said in her mommy warning voice

"Well I'll see you guys soon" Derek said

"Good night" Meredith replied as she hung up the phone.

"Will Meredith Grey please come up to the gate desk, Meredith Grey" Meredith heard over the intercom as she and Emma waited to board their flight to New York. It was a red eye flight, Meredith was exhausted and planned on sleeping on the plane after staying up to finish up packing and ensuring everything was secure in their apartment. Unlike her Emma had went to bed earlier than usual and was a morning person, so even at 3:30am in the security check point her daughter was happily talking to all the TSA employees while Meredith wanted to just bang her head against a wall.

"I was paged" Meredith yawned as she reached the gate desk

"It seems you have been approved for the upgrade to min cabin select" The lady said

"I'm sorry I didn't request for one" Meredith said confused "There must be a mistake"

"I have an upgrade for a Miss Meredith Grey and Emma Shepherd with the upgrade paid for by a Derek Shepherd" The lady said cross checking the information on the screen

"Damn you Derek" Meredith mumbled

"Think about it this way, more leg room so you can sleep a little more comfortably" The lady smiled handing Meredith her new boarding pass "We will be boarding in about 10 minutes and you and the little one will be in group 1 boarding"

"Thanks" Meredith said before heading back to the chairs where she and Emma were waiting and thinking about the first time Emma had been on a plane.

* * *

_Flashback_

_"One grande white mocha" Derek said as he returned from a coffee trip in the airport. They were heading east to visit some of the schools Meredith had gotten into. Although Meredith already said she was committed to Washington University, Derek still said she should at least visit other schools_

_"Thank you" Meredith said giving him a kiss as he sat down next to her. Emma was contently sitting in her infant car seat that connected to the stroller. They still had about an hour before they could board the plane but only going through security the two of them were already tired of travelling. TSA procedures made it hard for them to travel as they measured out the liquids Meredith had packed for Emma's formula, S they rummaged through all the bags and with Emma being fussy it didn't make it easier with Meredith and Derek having to take off their coats and shoes. However after security Emma relaxed and was sitting contently._

_"How are you princess" Derek said lifting Emma out of her car seat "feeling better?" he said dropping a kiss on her cheek causing the baby to give a big toothless grin_

_"Let's just hope our timing works and she sleeps through the flight. The last thing we need is a screaming baby and angry plane companions" Meredith sighed knowing that travelling with a 6 month old was going to be an experience_

_"Oh My" an older lady explained approaching the two "Is this your daughter?" she asked referring to the smiling Emma in Derek's arms_

_"Why yes it is, say my name is Emma" Derek said waving the baby's hand_

_"Well aren't you the cutest little thing ever, she looks just like her Daddy well except she got her mommy's nose. How old is she?" the woman asked_

_"She is just about 6 months" Meredith replied tickling Emma's cheek getting another toothless grin_

_"Well she is adorable, I must get to my gate, safe travels" he woman said as she proceeded to her gate_

* * *

Present Day

" Baggage claim will be at claim 54B, Thank you for choosing American Airlines we hope to fly with you again." the pilot announced over the intercom

Meredith yawned; it was a good flight with little turbulence. Both she and Emma got to sleep and were feeling much more refreshed. Meredith and Emma walked hand in hand out of the plane, every stewardess saying a goodbye to Emma who had become the favorite passenger on the plane. Meredith turned on her phone and quickly shot Derek a text

_Meredith: Just landed, headed to baggage claim. Em is super excited_

_Derek: Just go ton Avenue C K see you soon :)_

Meredith held Emma's hand tightly as the New York airport was much busier as for one it was New York and second it was mid day there. She followed signs to their designated baggage claim when she looked up and green eyes met blue and a smile came across both faces.

_So come_

_You should_

_And view_

_I would_

_This Ave_

_You could_

* * *

So they're finally together in person... what do you think?


	6. Anything Can Happen

**Anything Can Happen**

_Baby, I'll give you everything you need  
I'll give you everything you need, oh  
I'll give you everything you need_

_…green eyes met blue and a smile came across both faces._

"Daddy!" Emma shouted as she let go of Meredith's hand and ran towards her dad who was waiting with a teddy bear with a flower and a balloon attached to it. She leaped into his arms as Derek spun her around a bit

"I've missed you so much Princess" Derek said kissing Emma's forehead "You've grown since I've last seen you"

"I used to wear a three but now mommy says she gonna have to start buying size four" Emma said holding up four fingers

"Maybe a five at the rate you've been eating" Meredith laughed catching up to them with their carry on luggage

"Meredith" Derek greeting her giving her a side hug with his free arm while Emma was in his other and gave a her a quick kiss on the cheek "How was the flight?" Derek asked as they walked towards baggage claim where bags were beginning to arrive from the plane

"Early, but smooth. We both got to catch up on sleep. Red eye isn't too bad when you get to sleep the whole way through" Meredith laughed

"Mommy can I have a snack?" Emma asked reaching for Meredith's bag where Meredith had bought a few things at the airport earlier in case Emma got hungry

"I believe I promised someone the New York pizza experience" Derek laughed as they collected the two bags

"Pizza!" Emma smiled

"Well here it's called pie baby" Meredith said as Derek led the way out of the busy airport

"Like apple pie?" the little girl said with a puzzled face

"Kind of" Derek laughed "Alright the car is on the fourth floor" Derek told Emma as they stepped into the garage elevator

"Isn't this New York, where we're supposed to take cabs and taxis? We were promised a New York experience" Meredith said poking fun of Derek

"Oh you'll get a night out on the town, but I figured it'd be best with all the luggage to take my car" Derek said hitting the clicker to make the car beep so he could locate his car "This way ladies" he said as he led them to his SUV.

* * *

"Mommy look!" Emma said getting her mother's attention. Derek had brought them to a family run pizzeria where Emma had all of the staff wrapped around their finger. The head pizza maker even allowed all of them in the back where they could throw their own dough before having their pizza made. The kitchen had a large window visible to the outside of the streets. Emma tossed her dough with the help of another chef and smiled at the final product. Meredith was videoing Emma only to turn to video Derek who after many attempts gave up on the process.

"Maybe you should help Daddy out" Meredith giggled "Alright you two, let's get back tot the table so these fine chefs can finish our pizzas"

"So what brings you guys here" The owner asked as he delivered their pizza to their table fresh from the oven

"Well we're here to visit my daddy" Emma said pointing at Derek "and he promised a New York pizza experience. But they aren't called pizzas here, mommy says they are called pie, right mommy?" Emma asked looking at her mother

"Yes, New York Pies" The owner laughed

"So how did you feel with class being done?" Derek asked as they all continued to work on their New York pizza pie

"Relieved but until I get those final grades in, I'm still just a bit tense" Meredith said "But I did what I could, studied my butt off for that one class. The exam went well I think. How's work?"

"I now know why my resident was always angry" Derek laughed "I'm constantly barking at my interns, I'm surprised half of them finished medical school. That reminds me, the chief of surgery has seen pictures of Emma in my locker and would like to meet her and you because he says you are a potential employee"

"That'd be nice" Meredith laughed "Living on the same coast"

"I know it hasn't been the easiest year" Derek sighed

"But we're doing the right thing for her" Meredith said wiping the pizza sauce off Emma's face

"Luckily the chief of surgery likes me and was as flexible as he could be with my schedule while you two are in town so we can enjoy all the time we have together. But there are some days that I'll be working a 48"

"That's fine Derek. You know she isn't excited about all the activities we have planned but she's most excited to spend time with you. She's missed you"

"I miss her too"

* * *

"And then they all lived happily ever after" Derek said finishing the story "Was that as good as you remember?"

"I don't know Daddy, you're princess voice doesn't sound like a girl" Emma giggled as she pointed out the flaws in Derek's bedtime story character imitations

"Well I'm gonna leave you two for your singing, mommy's going to take a shower" Meredith said giving Emma a kiss "I should be done by the time she's asleep" She told Derek. Living alone Derek only had a one bedroom apartment suite, as he didn't need the space. He had turned the media room into a temporary room. While he had insisted they use his bedroom and he crash on the couch, Meredith held her ground and Derek didn't want to fight her on it. Luckily the sleeper couch was quite comfortable and folded out into a queen size bed.

"Ready Em?" Derek asked as he started to strum his guitar

"Yes" Emma yawned

"Here comes the sun doo doo doo doo, here comes the sun and I say…" Derek sang softly

"So this isn't so much a bachelor pad" Meredith laughed as she emerged from his bedroom looking at the photos that lined the hallway

"Hmmm I think all the pictures of my daughter scream bachelor" Derek said handing her a glass of wine

"Oh yeah, just what every girl is looking for in a one night stand" Meredith said taking a sip "She asleep?"

"She was out before I got to the second verse" Derek chuckled "today must have wore her out"

"Red eye flight across the country, and an afternoon of shopping and a trip to the park, I'm surprised she didn't fall asleep half way through the day"

"You must be exhausted"

"The real question is when am I not exhausted" Meredith laughed "Nice place you got here, very you"

"What were expecting" Derek asked

"You know the stale modern bachelor pad"

"Well it used to be modern until Tiffany moved out" Derek sighed "She liked the whole clean lines, black and white business. I like it this way, feels like a home"

"What happened with you and Tiff, I thought you guys were going places, she's the first to have moved in with you" Meredith asked in curiosity

"Well we were on the same page. On paper we worked but let's face it she's a New York girl and I'm the nature loving fishing guy. In the end she wanted the fast pace lifestyle of a New York media person. She was into all the new trends and while she had time for me, she would never have time for a family. I already have Emma and in the future I'd like to have another kid, have the picket fence and the dog. Anybody in your life?"

"I'm a full time student and a single mom, I don't have time to date" Meredith laughed

"The leading lady in my life is not even four years old yet" Derek laughed "to being parents" he said as he raised his glass to Meredith

"To being parents" Meredith smiled as they clicked their glasses together

"So tomorrow morning I figure we stay in, make some pancakes and maybe go for a walk? I have a night shift so I'm going to need to sleep around 3 so I don't fall asleep during any surgeries"

"That would be bad" Meredith said "But breakfast and a walk to the park sounds good, I might bring my sketch pad"

"Drawing again?" Derek asked knowing all too well that if Meredith was drawing, it meant she had things on her mind

* * *

_Flashback_

_Derek came into the living room after finishing up the final touches of the nursery. He sat next to Meredith and she leaned on him showing him her latest sketch. It was a the silhouette of a little girl in a dress, her arm was reaching for the sky_

_"This is nice" Derek smiled_

_"It's a little girl reaching for he stars. I want our little girl to never be afraid of dreaming. I want her to chase her dreams, my mother always crushed mine" Meredith said quietly "I want her to have big dreams and to chase them, and I want to be there supporting her every step of the way. Whether it be a sport, an instrument I want to be the mom who supports her"_

_"And you will" Derek reassured knowing her biggest fear was to be like her own mother "You are going to an amazing mother" he said kissing her forehead and putting her sketch pad aside_

* * *

Present Day

"Yeah, Just have had a lot on my mind lately" Meredith sad in reply to his question

"Like what" Derek asked

"I just don't know what I want in life. I think it's the stress but I was kind of hoping this vacation away from Washington would help clarify things. I just feel a little lost. I almost feel like somewhere along the line I forgot who Meredith was"

"Well as important as Em is, you have to find time for yourself. Let's go out next week, Just me and you, let's just be young adults. Let's see a show, go out for dinner, maybe even a bar" Derek chuckled

"I haven't been to a bar in two years" Meredith giggled

"My mom would love to watch Emma. Let's just be young for a night, this is New York who knows what'll happen. Anything can happen" Derek smiled.

Derek settled into his bed after talking to Meredith a bit more. The room no longer smelled of his cologne but of Lavender from Meredith's shower earlier that evening. The scent oddly brought comfort. He wasn't going to lie; Meredith still gave him butterflies just as she did 5 years ago. She would always hold a special place in his heart; she was the mother of his child. But at the same time his mind did wander to what would have happened if they had given their relationship a second chance, but at the same time neither of them wanted to risk a nasty break up where Emma's happiness could be at stake. But here they were 3 years later, both of them have grown up and now they were going on what most people would consider a date. He knew he shouldn't be thinking romantically but deep down he always wondered and after all this was New York and the new Meredith and the new Derek… anything can happen.

_After the war we said we'd fight together_  
_I guess we thought that's just what humans do_  
_Letting darkness grow_  
_As if we need its palette and we need its colour_  
_But now I've seen it through_  
_And now I know the truth_

_That anything could happen_  
_Anything could happen_

* * *

Well...


	7. Light On

**Light On**

_Try to leave a light on when I'm gone_

_Something I rely on to get home_

_One I can feel at night, a naked light_

_A fire to keep me warm_

The morning went as planned, they all made breakfast together, took Emma to park and now Derek was packing his bag for his shift later that night. Emma adjusted quickly to her new surroundings and was contently coloring at the kitchen table.

"Em, what kind of sandwich do you want?" Meredith asked as she navigated the kitchen. Derek made it very clear she should feel at home during their stay, he showed her the grand tour and made note to her of where everything was so that when he was at work she could find everything. So here she stood in his kitchen making lunch for everybody.

"One that goes gobble gobble" Emma giggled

"Turkey it is" Meredith said going to the refrigerator "Derek" Meredith called

"Yeah" Derek answered from his bedroom

"Did you want a sandwich? I'm making lunch" She called back to him

"Yes please" Derek said as he walked into the kitchen "That is a very pretty picture Em" Derek said sitting next to her

"Judging by your selection I'm going to guess Roast Beef Sandwich with provolone, light mayo and olive oil drizzle" Meredith said pulling everything out to make his sandwich

"Right on the money" Derek chuckled getting up to help her with lunch

"Some things never change" Meredith said as she continued making sandwiches. Derek smiled as he got the plates, it's funny how they both remembered the little details about each other such as her remembering his favorite sandwich and the fact that he liked his cut right down the center and not diagonally.

"Apple juice or Orange juice Em?" Derek asked

"Apple Juice, Duh" Emma laughed causing Derek to chuckle at the adult like tone coming from his three year old

"Alright you monkeys, lunch is ready" Meredith said bringing over the plates to the table

"Hey I'm not the monkey, Emma is" Derek laughed behind her as he carried a plate of fresh veggies as a side to their lunch

"She had to get her monkiness from one of us, and I'm certain it wasn't me" Meredith giggled sitting down on one side of Emma

"Oh I beg to differ, I believe you were the brains of shenanigans back in the day" Derek chuckled sitting on the other side of Emma

* * *

_Flashback_

_The music was blaring through the club, clubs typically weren't Derek's scene but Meredith had convinced him to let loose after a long week. Derek was sitting at the bar with his scotch in his hand and smiled when he saw his friends returning from the dance off on the dance floor. Derek Shepherd never danced in public._

_"One dance Derek?" Meredith whined. There was no doubt she was drunk,, she was long gone about an hour ago_

_"Mer, you know I don't dance" Derek said standing and giving his girl a kiss_

_"For me?" Meredith asked batting her eyes and biting her lip knowing that she usually got her way if she did so. Derek looked at his girlfriend and sighed_

_"I need another tequila and a scotch" Derek called to the bar tender. Meredith was wearing a short fitted black dress that plunged in the front and basically had no fabric to cover her back. Derek protested the outfit when he saw her emerge from the room earlier that evening but she reassured him that men can look at her all they wanted but he was the only one able to see where the dress left others to use their imagination, and he was the only one touching and getting his way with her. The whole night men had made passes at Meredith on the dance floor and asked her to dance but she simply turned them down. The bartender handed him his drinks and he and Derek both downed their drinks before Meredith dragged him to the middle of the dance floor._

_Derek stood as Meredith began to sway her body to the beat of the music, grinding her body against his getting a reaction from both of them. Derek slowly began to move; holding her close making sure everybody knew she was his. As their bodies continued to grind and both of their hands began to roam Meredith reached to and pulled Derek in for a kiss_

_"Hmmm" Derek moaned against her lips_

_"Let's get out of here" Meredith smiled as she took his hand and led him towards the exit. As soon as they were out Derek noticed Meredith had taken a different route and was not heading to the car but to the alley of the bar_

_"Where are we going" Derek asked only to be cut off by Meredith pinning him against the wall and kissing him. Derek smiled against her kiss and quickly turned so that she was against the wall_

_"Derek" Meredith whispered looking into his eyes. He knew those eyes, she wanted him and wanted him now_

_"Mer, are you sure you don't want to at least go to the car" Derek asked fearing they could get caught_

_"I can't wait" Meredith said before unbuttoning his shirt "So you can either drop your pants or I can fly solo" Meredith said raising her eyebrow leaving Derek no real option but to be adventurous. This is why he loved her; she brought so much adventure in his life._

* * *

Present Day

Meredith smiled as she passed through the hallway of Derek's small apartment. On the walls were pictures of his family and Emma as she reached the end she noticed there was a picture missing. Derek had left for work and while his family offered to keep them company, she was still tired from all the travel. Emma had gone down pretty easy and Meredith now was tidying up the apartment from Emma's playtime earlier. She picked up a few scraps of paper Emma had torn that had managed to get on the floor and walked to the nearest trashcan in the living room. She noticed a picture frame in the trashcan, out of curiosity she lifted up the frame and a slight giggle escaped from her lips. It was a picture of Derek and Tiffany, it had to be taken a little less than a year ago as the background was a Christmas decorated time square. Meredith had never met Tiffany or any other of Derek's girlfriends after they had split except for Rose. He had dated her a few months after they decided to go their separate ways.

* * *

_Flashback_

_"I'm looking for Derek Shepherd" Meredith said juggling a baby car seat in one hand and a baby bag and her purse in the other "I was called, he was in an accident"_

_"This way" The nurse said leading her towards a room and opening a door_

_"Meredith" Derek breathed "Before you yell and scream and say I told you so, I'm fine a little banged up but I'm fine"_

_"Oh thank god" Meredith said in relief as she put Emma's car seat down and walking over to Derek to look at his injuries. Her fingers traced over the stitching over his eyebrow where he had been cut and her other hand went to his cast_

_"It's broken, not major so no surgery but they say 6 weeks" Derek sighed "I'm sorry"_

_"How fast were you going?" Meredith asked. Since their break up Derek's driving had been crazy. He had been speeding down the streets of Seattle, of course when he was alone in the car. Meredith sought it to be his outlet from being a full time intern and new dad but begged him to get it under control. His behavior had been reckless lately and Meredith wasn't the only one to notice it, even his best friend Mark said he was scared to be in a car with Derek._

_"100, hit a curb, sent me spiraling into a pole" Derek said guilty_

_"I came as so as I could baby, Mark told me" a woman said as she entered the room rushing towards Derek. Meredith figured this must be Rose, the new woman in Derek's life. It stung, it really did. It was hard to see Derek move on, but this was a mutual decision to split and just because she couldn't find somebody didn't mean he couldn't. But at the moment she knew she couldn't handle a relationship, she had to devote her time to daughter and school._

_"They're keeping me over night" Derek said "Just for observation"_

_Emma began to fuss and Meredith gently rocked the car seat to soothe the baby_

_"Ma'am I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Visitor hours are over only immediate family is allowed" the charge nurse said to Rose_

_"I'm his girlfriend" Rose said_

_"And you are?" The nurse asked confused referring to Meredith_

_"Meredith Grey" Meredith said_

_"Oh okay, you're listed as in case of emergency, you can stay. You have to go" The nurse said leading Rose out of the room. Meredith smiled feeling a little victory but in the long run she knew she would have to get used to Derek being with other women._

* * *

Present Day

Meredith smiled as she uploaded pictures from her phone to her Facebook page. While Emma was a happy child, she did notice the slightly bigger smile and sparkle in her daughter's eyes when she was around her dad. She liked this, all three of them being together and from time to time throughout the day she let her mind imagine what it would be like if they were an actual family. She knew her heart would always have a special place for Derek, he was Emma's father and they had been through so much together. But what they had now was working and while she did wonder if they could ever be something more, she didn't want to risk the great relationship they had now. She closed her laptop and went to make sure the apartment door was locked. Derek wouldn't be home until 5am so she made sure she left a light on in the kitchen and she placed a bowl and the box of Museli on the table in case he had the munchies. She made sure to put the picture Emma left for him next to bowl before heading back to the living room for some sleep and hopefully to clear her head of her new cloudy thoughts.

_Try to leave a light on when I'm gone_

_Even in the daylight, shine on_

_And when it's late at night you can look inside_

_You won't feel so alone_

* * *

So Meredith has some feelings too. the next chapter is all about Emma and Derek and really where this story and adventure begins to take off. Please let me know what you think :)

-J


	8. I Feel Pretty

**I Feel Pretty**

_I feel pretty_

_Oh so pretty_

_I feel pretty and witty and bright_

_And I pity_

_Any girl who isn't me tonight_

Today was Emma and Daddy Day. Derek had the day off and his sisters wanted to catch up with Meredith so today was the perfect opportunity to spoil his princess. Derek was excited to have his little girl for the whole day, he had missed out on a lot in a year. When he left for New York she was really starting to talk and become more cognitive but now she was a little person with opinions. He wasn't going to lie to himself as excited as he was for today he was also excited for his night out with Meredith in a few days

"Hello welcome to Sweet and Sassy" The young girl behind the counter greeted

"Hi I made a reservation for Emma Shepherd" Derek said as Emma shyly hid behind him. As much as she loved attention, when she was in the unfamiliar she tend to be shy.

"Is this the little princess who is here for a princess spa package?" The lady asked trying to make Emma feel comfortable "Dad why don't head with us this way to the facial room. The young hostess, Jessica, led them through the girl store. Emma's eyes widened at all the glitter and pink. The store most definitely catered towards little girls with the pink and black zebra print walls and feather boa curtains.

"Alright Miss Emma, why don't you have a seat in this royal chair" Jessica said showing Emma the pink glitter recliner. She noticed Emma was still clinging onto Derek's shirt

"Go on Em" Derek encouraged

"Here Dad why don't you sit n this one" Jessica said showing hi the purple sparkle recliner right next to Emma's. With her father at her side Emma sat in her chair

"So what's the special occasion?" Jessica asked as she whipped up the facial mask "Is it your birthday?"

"No" Emma said "It's Emma and Daddy day and we are going on a date tonight" Emma said breaking out of her shyness

"That sounds fun. Alright Miss Emma this is a chocolate mask, it taste pretty good" Jessica laughed "I'm going to put this all over your face and it's going to make your skin very soft and pretty" Jessica said. Emma looked at bit hesitant and looked at her dad for reassurance

"Here why don't we let Dad go first" Jessica said looking at Derek "Will that make you more comfy Emma?".

"Well I have to look my best too" Derek chuckled as Jessica put the mask on Derek followed by the application on Emma. While the mask firmed on their face Emma got her nails done in Pink glitter and Derek just got his nails cleaned. Derek could help but feel the others looking at him and Emma. AS their nails dried Derek took a picture of the two of them and sent it to Meredith. After their day at the children's spa concluded Derek went to pay at the front when Jessica came by with a feather boa and princess crown for Emma.

"I would just like to say it's nice seeing a dad with his daughter in here. My husband wouldn't be caught dead ten feet from this place" Jessica said helping them check out

"What can I say, she's my leading lady" Derek laughed "I feel pretty, Oh so pretty, so pretty and witty and bright" He snag softly to Emma

"Now I look extra pretty for our date tonight daddy" Emma said as she twirled around the salon

"Alright Em, say thank you to Miss Jessica" Derek said as they headed towards the door

"Thank you!" Emma responded as they left

* * *

_Flashback_

_Derek didn't understand how Meredith did this. She was not only a young mom, but a full time student and an amazing girlfriend who always had dinner made and the apartment clean. Here Derek stood in a messy apartment with a screaming baby 4 hours into Emma and Daddy day. As much as Derek wanted to call Meredith to come home or for some tips, he knew she deserved a day to herself. Having a 3 month old and being a full time pre-med student wasn't easy and with Derek working she often had Emma to herself and had to upkeep the home. So as a little gesture Derek booked her a day at the spa with her best friend where she could get massages and facials and whatever girls do there._

"_Okay Emma how about we try a walk" Derek cooed at the baby trying to get her to calm down. He tried carrying her, swinging her, bouncing her but nothing worked. He placed Emma in her car seat and got the stroller before heading for a stroll in the park. It was a cloudy day but at least it was warm. After a 20-minute walk Emma was fast asleep and Derek walked back to their apartment in hopes to tidy up before Meredith got back. He cleaned their bedroom, the living room and the kitchen and made notes of things they had to buy at the store on the weekend. The mid part of their day went smoothly and Derek was hoping Emma's morning was just a fluke however the evening didn't go as planned either. _

"_Here comes the sun… shit… the rice" Derek cursed mid song as he was trying to soothe the baby and cook dinner. Emma was fussy, dinner was almost burning and Meredith could walk in at any moment more specifically right then._

"_What the heck" Meredith giggled as she put her bag down on the table_

"_uh surprise" Derek chuckled _

"_Oh come here baby" Meredith said walking towards them. Derek went in for a kiss only to be surpassed as she reached for Emma_

"_I meant my actually baby" Meredith giggled trying to comfort Emma as she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek "Should I call for pizza?" _

"_No, I think I can save it" Derek said getting into action now that he had an extra free arm_

"_You amaze me" Derek said as they were nestled up against each other on the couch enjoying a glass of wine "I don't know how you do it"_

"_Do what?" Meredith asked looking up at him as her head was laying in his chest_

"_All of it. You're an honors student with one of the hardest degrees, you're an amazing mother and an amazing girlfriend. You make it seem so easy" Derek said inhaling her scent of lavender from hair as he took brought his glass up for another sip_

"_It's not easy, but it'll be worth it one day" Meredith said "Both of you make it worth it" she said placing her now empty wine glass on the coffee table and turning her body to catch his lips "Thank you for today" _

"_You deserve it." He said with a smile_

* * *

Present Day

"Strawberry is my favorite" Emma said happily as she sat with Derek on the bench with Derek in central park eating ice cream

"Just like your mom" Derek smiled. Derek scanned their surrounding and smiled at the family walking the park. The little girl had to be about Emma's age, maybe a bit older. She walked hand in hand as she was in-between her parents. Every few steps the pair would lift their child to give her a bit of a swing causing the little girl to erupt in laughter. They looked like the perfect family.

"Daddy I'm full" Emma said bringing Derek's attention back to Emma

"Ready for our next adventure?" Derek asked

"Yes" Emma said eagerly as Derek threw away their leftovers and wiped Emma's face

"So you know how you don't have a lot of toys at my house?" Derek asked

"Yeah, mommy let me bring some but we couldn't bring a lot because mommy said the plane wouldn't be able to hold all of my toys" Emma said as they got into a cab

"Washington and 8th please?" Derek asked the driver who nodded and drove off "We are going to get you some more"

"Can I get a Furby?" Emma asked

"A what?"

"A furby. Mommy won't buy me one, she said they're creepy"

"We'll see" Derek said

"So Em, obviously you like Chinese food" Derek said as her dining selection was Panda Express. They had done some shopping, he got Emma some clothes for Thanksgiving and Christmas and made some mental notes on what to buy her for Christmas while she was here. He asked her what she would like to eat for dinner before heading back home and of all the places that surrounded her she waned Panda Express.

"I love Panda Express. Mommy doesn't like it so I don't get it a lot. I only get to eat it when Autn Christina brings me home from school. Do you think Mommy will get mad hat you bought me a furby?" Emma asked. Derek saw why Meredith was creeped out by the thing, it was a bird or an owl or a chicken, he wasn't sure. It had big eyes that just looked at you and it made weird noises. He mostly bought because Emma's lit up when she saw them and the fact that she would have it than the six thousand other toys in the store. But he wasn't going to lie he also wanted to creep Meredith out with it.

"No I thnk she'll be excited" Derek chuckled "So Em you like Chinese food, but what does mommy like?" Derek said trying to get ideas of places to take Meredith

"She keeps saying she misses a place called Joe's" Emma said causing Derek to chuckled "But she really likes it when we go to that place with the steaks" she said as she continued to eat her orange chicken. Derek smiled she always did like his steak dinners. He pulled out his phone and looked up some of the finest steak places in New York

"Daddy no phones at Dinner" Emma reminded him

"I'm sorry princess" Derek laughed, "Does mommy still have flowers at home?"

"No but she likes the purple one the flower man brings"

* * *

_Flashback_

"_Who is that?" Meredith said walking to the door. It was supposed to be a lazy day, just her and Emma having a girls day on her birthday. Meredith played sick and didn't plan on going to class so she figured she and Emma could go out to downtown Seattle for the day. Meredith looked through the peep whole of her apartment door confused_

"_Hello" Meredith said opening the door_

"_I have a delivery for a Meredith Grey"_

"_I'm Meredith" _

"_Well have a nice day" The man said handing her a beautiful flower arrangement "If you could just sign here"_

_Meredith scrawled her signature before heading back inside to read the card_

_I hope they're still your favorite. 24 lavender flowers for the birthday girl! Happy 24__th__ Birthday, Meredith. _

_-Derek_

* * *

Present Day

After dinner he and Emma took the ferryboat to the other side of town where he had left their car earlier that morning. Emma was taking a nap in his arms when he did some serious thinking. He knew he loved Meredith, she was the mother of his child, but after the few days of being with her, he knew it was much more than that. He knew they were different people, they have been separated for 2 years and living on different coast for a year. But all things aside when he thought about the things he loved about Meredith, it wasn't the fact that she was Emma's mother it was her smiled, her wit, her determination, her ability to be the strong one when things were tragically falling apart. Derek Shepherd realized the mixed emotions he had been feeling since they got there were feelings of love because he Derek Shepherd was falling for Meredith Grey and from what he could tell she had feeling for him again too. He couldn't rush things; he knew it would send Meredith running but he didn't have a lot of time. All he knew was somehow and someway he had to get Meredith to at least say she feels something before they left in a month. All she has to say that there's something.

_I feel stunning (I feel stunning)_

_And entrancing (And entrancing)_

_Feel like running and dancing for joy (Feel like running and dancing for joy)_

_For I'm loved_

_By a pretty wonderful boy_

* * *

Well here we go, Derek has only a short amount of time to get Meredith to say she feels a connection too. He can't just come out full force and say he loves her, that'll send Meredith running back to Seattle. Well he's got a mission can he accomplish it?


	9. Sweet Child O' Mine

**Sweet Child O' Mine**

_She's got a smile it seems to me_  
_Reminds me of childhood memories_  
_Where everything_  
_Was as fresh as the bright blue sky_

He had promised her a night out in New York and while he wanted to make grand gestures and go for the five star, steak dinner experience and confess his love for her he still wasn't sure if Meredith felt the same way. He knew there was something but he didn't know if it was enough to be a relationship or if indeed he was making it all up in his head. Also he learned over the years that you couldn't just spring big things up on Meredith, it usually sent her running for the hills. So here they were two young adults who happened to have a child together enjoying a night out in the city

"So where to first?" Meredith asked

"You're gonna think I'm crazy" Derek laughed "I actually didn't make plans"

"What?" Meredith smiled raising her eyebrow "Derek Shepherd, the man who plans out his meals for the month doesn't have plans for he next how many hours?"

"Well you said you wanted a night of being a young adult" Derek said "I figured we'd show up and see what the city has to offer, it changes daily here" Derek said. They turned the corner and Derek smiled at the look on Meredith's face. There they stood on Broadway and 42nd, the sounds of the city proved this was more than alive at 8pm when in Seattle the streets began to become quiet. The large crowds of people and the massive lighting from all the screens made Meredith gasp. She had seen it during daylight, she had seen pictures of it but standing there she took it all in.

"Wow" Meredith said

"Welcome to New York" Derek smiled taking her hand "Well let's explore"

As they walked down the street they saw street performers of all sorts from magicians to dancers and artist. And now here they sat on a stool, Meredith on Derek's lap as an artist drew their caricature.

"Derek that tickles" Meredith giggled

"What?" Derek chuckled

"Your breathing on my neck" She giggled "And it's tickling, stop"

"You want me to stop breathing?" Derek laughed, "That's a bit harsh"

"Well maybe if your nose wasn't so big you wouldn't be breathing on my neck. Can you at least move your big nose" she teased

"Hey now it wasn't always like this, I had a nice nose once. Then I broke it" Derek laughed

"Thank god Em got my nose" Meredith laughed

"All done" the young man said handing them their canvas

"This must go up on the wall" Derek laughed at the goofy proportions of their heads to their body

"Emma will get a kick out of this. Now she'll be asking if she can just draw for a living" Meredith laughed as the pair continued to explore the square

"One hot dog for the lady" Derek chuckled handing Meredith a Nathan's Hot Dog

"So this is what New Yorkers eat?" Meredith giggled taking a bite "Hot Dogs?"

"This is a Nathan's Hot Dog right off a street cart in New York, or a quick snack" Derek laughed.

"Oh My Gosh, this is so good" Meredith exclaimed

"It's a Nathan's hot dog, of course it's good" Derek laughed

"What time do you go in tomorrow?" Meredith asked as the two began to walk towards Central Park

"Nine" Derek said shaking his head "I have a 24 tomorrow but my mom said something about having you and Emma over for dinner" Derek shrugged. As they continued to walk down the street Derek showed Meredith the little details on the New York streets when they passed by a bar

"Do I recall someone saying they haven't been to a bar in years?" Derek asked as he held out his hand

"It has been too long" Meredith laughed taking his hand as they walked into the bar.

"I need a shot of tequila and a double scotch single malt" Derek told the bartender

"No getting wasted tonight Dr. Shepherd, you have to save lives tomorrow" Meredith laughed

"One drink won't kill us" Derek laughed. Suddenly both of them heard an ear piercing sound from the other side of the bar

"Karaoke night" Meredith smiled "I remember the last time we did karaoke"

"Come on" Derek said taking her arm

"What" Meredith said bringing her drink with her

"Is there a slot?" Derek asked the man at the table

"Wanna go next" the guys asked

"What?!" Meredith asked

"Yeah, Derek Shepherd" Derek said

"What are you doing?" Meredith giggled

"Being young" Derek said taking the mic and leading Meredith to the front of the small crowd before taking the small stage

"You are crazy" Meredith said as he walked up

"I'm not the guy who typically does this kind of thing, but heck this one is for you Mer" Derek said into the mic before downing his scotch and signaling the man to start the song. As the music smiled he pointed out to Meredith "For you Mer"

Meredith blushed as the small crowd looked at her and the music began to play and a small smiled came on her face as Sweet Child of Mine began to play

* * *

_Flashback_

_"You're boring" Meredith moaned into Derek's lips as they sat at a table at their favorite bar_

_"I'm not boring" Derek laughed knowing all too well his girlfriend was drunk_

_"You won't dance, and you won't drink anymore" Meredith frowned "You're old and boring" she pouted causing Derek to smile_

_"You my love are drunk, I'm slightly buzzed but I have to drive us back. You know I don't dance in public unless I'm drunk" Derek chuckled_

_"I'm dating a wallflower" Meredith as she moved over so that she practically sitting on his lap "A very hot wall flower though. Those girls keep looking at you"_

_"I guess to them I'm interesting" Derek teased causing Meredith to pout "Relax Meredith, you know the only person I ever plan on going home with for the rest of my life is you" he said kissing her softly "even if you think I'm boring"_

_"Better be" She mumbled into his lips "I think you're getting old"_

_"Get up" Derek smiled_

_"What?" Meredith asked confused_

_"Just get up" He smiled again. Reluctantly she got off Derek's lap, glaring at the girls of the other table. Derek grabbed her hand and led her to the stage where open mic night was happening. A few of their friends were watching the people singing and Derek told Meredith to stay with them. Meredith just nodded and wondered what her boyfriend was up to_

_"I have been told I'm boring. I'm normally the kind of guy to do this but to prove my girlfriend wrong I'm going to sing you nice folks a song. I'm sober enough to know what I'm doing and read the lyrics but I am buzzed enough not to care" Derek chuckled "Hit it Mr. Karaoke man" Guns n' Roses began playing through the bar as Derek began to belt out Sweet Child Of Mine_

_"Well?" Derek asked as he walked back over to Meredith after his show_

_"Right when I think you're boring, you rise" Christina laughed_

_"You are only a little boring now" Meredith giggled "Let's get out of here" she whispered into his ear_

* * *

Present Day

"I can't believe you just did that" Meredith laughed as Derek got off the stage "And you're sober"

"It was actually kind of fun" Derek said as they headed out of the bar. The cool New York air was refreshing from the stuffy bar "We better head back"

"Yeah it's pretty late" Meredith said noticing the time. Derek hailed a cab to take them back to his mom's house where they picked up a sleeping Emma.

"Thanks Mom"Derek whispered as he picked up the sleeping Emma from the couch

"Where's Meredith?" Carolyn asked

"She's in the car" Derek said

"Well how'd it go?"

"Just a night out" Derek smiled

"I know you Derek Shepherd and I haven't seen you this happy in a while. I knew you were going to be excited with Emma coming into to town but I've noticed that twinkle in your eye when you talk about Meredith." Carolyn said

"What are you saying Ma?" Derek chuckled

"I've always been fond of Meredith and I know you two have a past but I get the feeling that even though you dated a few women here and there you were never completely over her"

"Why would you say that?"

"Because every woman you've been with you've compared to her and the rest of them haven't lived up to the expectation"

"It's late Ma" Derek said kissing his mothers cheek "We'll talk soon. Thanks for taking her tonight" he said stepping out of the door

* * *

_Flashback_

_"So Nancy said you broke up with Taylor " Carolyn said casually_

_"She just wasn't for me" Derek sighed as he helped his mother prepare Sunday family dinner. Taylor had been the third girl Derek had dated since his break up with Meredith the girl he dated before Tiffany._

_"She was nice though, really sweet" Carolyn said digging for more information "She seemed like your type, blonde, sweet—" she started before getting cut off by Derek_

_"She was just so worried about what everybody thinks of her. She was always chasing the hottest trends, trying to make us a trendy couple like we were celebrities… have you seen what she's done to my apartment. She's 5th avenue and I'm man in the wild" Derek said_

_"Oh don't be too picky dear" Carolyn laughed at his son_

_"All I want is a girl who doesn't care what people think, who isn't scared to go camping. The girl who goes out in a ratty old t-shirt and sweats rather than the hottest look off New York fashion show" Derek stated._

* * *

Present Day

"She was is out" Derek chuckled emerging from his bedroom where Emma asked to sleep because she had left her stuffed animals on Derek's bed after playing with them earlier that afternoon.

"Hmmm" Meredith said as she curled on the couch looking at what movies were on

"Hey Silence is pretty good" Derek said sitting next to her

"I've never seen the whole thing, I get too scared" She half laughed

"Let's watch it" Derek said grabbing the throw and spreading it across the couch so they both had some covers

"Just don't laugh at me," She giggled, "I tend to hid under the covers and jump a lot"

"I'll save you" He chuckled closing the gap between them putting his arm around her He felt like a teenager at the movies making a move on his date but it wasn't as awkward or obvious as they were obviously comfortable with each other. It was long into the movie that Meredith was almost on top of him clutching onto his shirt as his arms wrapped tightly around her to comfort her from the scary being of Hannibal Lecter.

_Now and then when I see her face_  
_She takes me away to that special place_  
_And if I'd stare too long_  
_I'd probably break down and cry_

_Oh, oh, oh_  
_Sweet child o' mine_

* * *

Please Review


	10. Open Arms

**I'm so sorry for the delay! Due to an unexpected surgery I haven't been able to think clearly with the pain or the pain medication. I'm starting to feel better and get into my usual routine. I'm sorry it's short but as I continue to heal the updates will be up more regularly. Enjoy.**

_How could our love be so blind_  
_We sailed on together_  
_We drifted apart_  
_And here you are_  
_By my side_

Meredith stirred in her sleep and a small smile came on her sleeping face. Secure she felt secure and warm. Her eyes slowly opened and she realized the TV was still on. Realizing she was still on the couch she realized the secure warm feeling she awoken to was Derek which she was laying on while his arms held her against his chest.

We must have fallen asleep Meredith thought quickly to last night's events. She had to admit, she loved this feeling and remembered how much she did love his embrace…

* * *

_Flashback_

"_Meredith calm down" Derek said watching his girlfriend pace frantically_

"_Are you seriously telling me to calm down?!" Meredith cried "I'm pregnant Derek, Pregnant, as in having a baby in a few months" she continued to pace_

"_I know what pregnant means, I did go to medical school" Derek chuckled_

"_Why are you taking this so lightly?! I've barely started my undergrad, you're not done with medical school yet Derek. A baby changes everything and.." She started rambling before Derek cut her off_

"_Come here" Derek said grabbing her arm "I know we're young and it's not ideal—"_

"_Anything but" Meredith interrupted only for Derek to put his finger over her lips_

"_But all I know is I love you and our baby. Our perfect little baby made out of our love Meredith. It's going to be tough and it's going to suck but think about it Mer a little baby that's a part me and a part of you" He said as she relaxed into his lap as he wrapped arms around her. Meredith's hands went to her stomach_

"_A baby" Meredith smiled "We're having a baby"_

"_I love you and our baby" Derek said resting his head on her shoulder _

"_Even when I'm going to be as big as a whale?" Meredith asked_

"_Even when you're as big as a whale and crying" Derek said kissing her cheek relieved she had calmed down_

"_Our baby" she said placing his hands on top of hers above where their little perfect baby was growing._

* * *

Present Day

Beep Beep Beep The alarm on Derek's phone sounded.

"Mmmm" Derek moaned reaching to where normally his nightstand stood only to feel something on his chest. Derek smiled at a sleeping Meredith still snoring in his arms. He fumbled around for his phone not wanting to wake her. He smiled as he successfully turned off the alarm. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment. He remembered the time when he always woke up with her in his arms, he had taken those moments for granted. Not this time. Derek buried his nose in her hair and inhaled the lavender scent. Sighing he gently shifted around so that she could lay on the couch and he covered her with a blanket from the other couch.

"Hmmm" Meredith said her eyes slowly opening as she rose from sleep

"Go back to sleep Mer, I'll be back this afternoon" Derek said gently rubbing her back.

"Have good day" She said shifting back to her slumbering position. He quietly padded through his apartment trying not to wake up Emma who was asleep in his room and Meredith who was asleep in the living room.

* * *

"So Meredith how is school?" Carolyn asked as she and Meredith prepared dinner. There was going to be a small family dinner at Carolyn's house tonight. She had picked up Meredith and Emma to get them out of the apartment and so she could spend time with both of them. Two of Derek's sisters, Kathleen and Nancy were coming over with their children and their husbands. Emma knew she had a big family from Derek's side but she had never met all of them, let alone be in the same house with all of them at once except for when she was a baby. Carolyn thought it'd be best for Emma to meet and play with a few of her cousins so she'll have familiar faces come Thanksgiving.

"It was a busy semester. I thought at one point I was going to pull all of my hair out" Meredith laughed "My final grades come out at midnight, so fingers crossed I get all A's"

"I'm sure you did well Meredith, you're very bright, probably smarter than Derek" Carolyn smiled

"We can hope" Meredith laughed

"Any thought of what you're going to do after school?"

"Well I'm applying pretty much everywhere to keep my options open. But hopefully I get into Seattle Grace or Mount Sinai" Meredith giggled "Like how my top option are on opposite coast of each other?"

"Derek told me Em is in school now" Carolyn asked as she put the vegetables Meredith cut into the pot

"She started a day school when I started the fall semester. She really seems to like it. Her teacher adores her"

"Who wouldn't" Carolyn smiled "If she's anything like her mom she's the most popular girl in school"

"I was not the most popular" Meredith laughed "I was the rebel with the pink hair"

"OH well I'm glad to here Emma is socializing with other kids. Nancy's youngest just started pre-k and because he never socialized when he was younger so he's having a hard time adjusting"

"Oh Em is already asking for her friends to come over, should I be concerned she has more boy friends than girl friends"

"Well maybe she's like her mom and doesn't do the girl drama" Carolyn laughed "Any boys in your life?" Carolyn asked hoping it wouldn't cause awkwardness in the room

"Between school and Em, I have no time. I've had a few dates but nothing that really stood out. Christina says my standards are too high" Meredith said

"Mama" Emma said yawning as she came into the kitchen "I'm tired". Meredith looked at the clock and saw it was just about Emma's nap time

"Why don't you take her up to Derek's room" Carolyn suggested, "I'm sure you remember where it is". Meredith nodded and took Emma by the hand before walking out of the kitchen and upstairs to Derek's childhood bedroom.

* * *

Meredith laid in the bed with Emma slowly rubbing her back as she cuddled into her mom and drifted to sleep. She let her mind wander, thinking about what her friend Christina said…

"_All I'm asking for is a man" Meredith said throwing her hand bag on the table before sitting by her friend on the sofa "How was Em?"_

"_She passed out around 8" Christina said "Was he that bad?"_

"_I swear every guy I go out with is either very boring or too immature" Meredith sighed "Thanks for babysitting Em. I know babies aren't your thing" _

"_Em is special, she's my goddaughter" Christina said "Well was he boring or immature?"_

"_The latter" Meredith sighed "They're either mature enough but too boring or frat boys. I want someone who sees his future and aims to be successful but still wants to have fun…"_

"_You want Derek" Christina said "He was the last person you really dated, so you're looking for someone better than him. That's going to be a tough one to top"_

Once Em had fallen into a deep enough slumber Meredith slowly left the bed. She covered Em in a light blanket when a picture on the bedside table caught her eye. It was one of she and Derek when they had first met. She smiled at the memory and looked around at the details of Derek's room. Above his headboard his childhood baseball bats were mounted. In the other corner were his old fishing rods and a few pictures of Derek and his father on fishing trips when he was younger. On the shelf above his desk were all of his school awards ranging from best smile to his nationally recognized science fair project trophy. She quietly exited the room ad walked down the familiar hallway to the stairs. She passed all the photos Carolyn had put up. There were family pictures when Derek and his sisters were just babies and graduation photos. As she got closer to the end of the hall she saw more updated pictures, she saw a newborn Emma in Derek's arms and a picture of her, Derek and Emma on her first birthday. She couldn't help but think about the security she felt being part of this family. Even though her only connection was to them was Emma. There were times like this morning when she had woken up in Derek's embrace that she thought about what life would be like had she and Derek stayed together, perhaps even gotten married. She smiled at the thought of waking up every morning next to Derek, taking family walks and vacations, having a family dinner every night and going to bed next to Derek every night.

* * *

Derek was resting in an on call room during his short break in between surgeries. He couldn't help but let his mind wander to the previous night. He thought the night went well. He really enjoyed Meredith's company and from what he could tell, she seemed to have had a good night. But the best part of all of it was this morning. At some point they had both dozed off watching a few late night shows after Silence of the Lambs finished and he had woken up this morning with his arms tightly around her and his nose buried in her hair. Lavender. He smiled remembering the first sense of his day was the smell of her hair, lavender. Thanksgiving was a few days away and he was excited. it would Emma's first holiday with his whole family. Suddenly his thoughts were interrupted by his alarm telling him it was time to head to the surgical floor. But after last night Derek knew, if there was any chance he and Meredith could be together again, he would welcome the thought with open arms

_So now I come to you_  
_With open arms_  
_Nothing to hide_  
_Believe what I say_  
_So here I am_  
_With open arms_  
_Hoping you'll see_  
_What your love means to me_  
_Open arms_


	11. As Long As You Love Me

**Sorry for the delay, I'm still recovering and rehabilitation is just as tiring as post op surgery was. Anyways I hope you guys are still reading. The next chapter is where things will begin to progress with our couple, with a nudge from a few family members.**

* * *

**As Long As You Love Me**

_And how you got me blind is still a mystery_  
_I can't get you out of my head_  
_Don't care what is written in your history_  
_As long as you're here with me_

"Oh my god, I'm so full" Meredith said as the entered Derek's small apartment

"Years later and you still haven't lost your appetite" Derek chuckled

"Nana's dinner was yummy. I helped make it daddy" Emma said as she took off her coat

"You did? That's probably why it was so delicious" Derek replied

"Your mom's cooking is going to make me gain so much weight while we are in town" Meredith said shaking her head

"And you will still be beautiful" Derek smiled as they entered the living area

"Thanks" Meredith blushed "Em why don't you grab your PJ's it's bath time then bed time"

Emma nodded and scurried off into "her room" as she called Derek's make shift room for her and Meredith.

"I'm seriously stuffed" Meredith said lying on the couch "I don't think I'll ever eat again"

"What a shame. You know that bag I brought to my mom's house? I got a strawberry cheesecake. I guess I'll have to eat it all by myself" He said sitting next to her head

"Maybe after I put Emma down I'll have my appetite back" She sat up smirking as she went to give Emma bath "But seriously, don't eat that thing without me"

"She is out" Meredith said quietly making her way back to the living room. Derek had tidied up his office while she put Emma down.

"You had a busy day, I'm surprised you're not about to pass out. I'm exhausted, too many idiots in the Emergency Room today" he said going to the refrigerator and grabbing a beer

"I'm tired, but semester grades go up at midnight" Meredith said "and that stupid pathology class has me all worried. Stupid professor didn't like me so I'm pretty sure he tried to make sure I didn't do well on some of those written exams." she began to ramble "Luckily he doesn't grade the final, but I need an A plus to keep an A in that class. It's freaking impossible, I should just drop out now"

"Relax Mer" Derek chuckled sitting on the couch next to her "Here, I think you need it more than me" he laughed handing her his opened beer. She smiled and took a sip before returning it to him

"Thanks" she sighed

"It's 10 o'clock and you are not about to just sit for two hours waiting in front of your computer, it will make you go crazy" Derek said closing her laptop and setting it aside

"but—" Meredith started

"No. You are going to sit here with me and relax and watch this replay of Full House from ages ago" He said pulling her closer.

"It's midnight!" Meredith said as soon as the clock struck 12. "Laptop Me!" She said looking at Derek who was chuckling. After two hours of TV Meredith found her self stretched across the couch with her head resting Derek's leg as he sat at the corner of the cough. He chuckled as he reached over and placed her laptop on her lap and watched as she frantically logged into her school page where she could access her grades.

"Why is this wifi so slow?!" she grumbled as the page slowly loaded

"I'm pretty sure it's not the wifi but the fact that students like you are overloading the server" he laughed as she began to scroll down the page

"Anatomy A plus, Medical Mathematics A Plus, A plus, A plus, oh god here it is pathology" she said taking a deep breath "You look—wait you'll still love me if I become a drop out and work at McDonalds right?" She said closing her eyes.

"Maybe not McDonalds, Chick fila a?" Derek smirked

"Derek I'm serious" Meredith frowned with her eyes still closed

Derek smiled at her apprehension and looked at the screen

"Oh Mer" Derek sighed

"I didn't get the A did I?" Meredith frowned opening her eyes and looking at the screen "You Jerk" She said quickly realizing Derek led her to believe she failed to get the A when in reality she got it. She quickly set her laptop aside and turned around to hit Derek on the chest

"Ouch" Derek laughed "I'm sorry"

"I can finally relax" Meredith smiled resting her head back on the sofa

"Mer we all know you're smarter than me, and I made it through" He assured her

* * *

_ I don't care who you are  
Where you're from  
What you did  
As long as you love me  
Who you are  
Where you're from  
Don't care what you did  
As long as you love me_

_Flashback_

"_What was I thinking? I can't be a mom. I had the worst mother in the world; I'd be the worst mother in the world. I am the worst mother in the world, I don't know what I'm doing, she's screaming Derek" Meredith cried as Emma wailed in her arms. "We're traumatizing her, no baby screams for this long"_

"_Meredith calm down. The doctor said she's going to be fussy until the infection passes" Derek said taking Emma from Meredith in an effort to calm both of them down. Emma had been fussy for the past few days and as the days progressed the fussiness escalated. Meredith left the nursery in tears to leave Derek with Emma. _

_An hour later Emma finally settled for a sleep. Relieved Derek made his way to the bedroom where Meredith was laying on the bed, he face stained with tears._

"_Mer" Derek said laying next to her, taking her hand. Meredith shifted so that she facing him "Meredith you are a great mom" he started_

"_Then why is she screaming? She never screams like that, babies don't scream like that" Meredith sighed_

"_Stop. Meredith you are an amazing mother. You've gone through everything since you knew you were pregnant to make sure she was healthy and since she arrived to make sure she was happy as well. It was you who told me we needed to see the doctor, that something wasn't right. I thought she was just being fussy, but you knew something was wrong and if it weren't for your instinct she'd be even more miserable because she wouldn't have medicine and she would be getting worse." He said kissing her softly relieved to see her calming down "You are an extraordinary mom and girlfriend" he smiled, happy to see her give him a meek smile "Now let's rest while Emma sleeps for a bit"_

_End of Flashback_

* * *

"Emma get down from there" Meredith said as she saw Emma begin to jump up the stairs of the hospital. They were here to have lunch with Derek and so Meredith could get some information regarding their internship program. While she would prefer to stay in Seattle if given the opportunity to Meredith knew she had to apply to other programs and if she couldn't get an internship spot at Seattle Grace her next choice would be in New York.

"Daddy!" Emma squealed at the sight of Derek coming down the stairs. He had just scrubbed out of surgery and looked tired

"Hi Princess" He smiled lifting her up and giving her a kiss on the forehead before meeting Meredith at the bottom of the staircase "Hi Mer" he said putting his hand on the small of her back "I believe I have a lunch date, the wonderful cafeteria is right this way" he said guiding them towards the cafeteria entrance.

"Daddy, do you always eat grass?" Emma asked her dad as they ate lunch together in the cafeteria.

"First of all, it's a salad" he chuckled "and I eat other things just maybe not the fried gunk your mommy eats" he smirked at Meredith

"Hey now" Meredith giggled "I'm having a salad right now"

"A fried chicken and ranch salad?" Derek chuckled

"RAWR" Emma growled picking up her dinosaur chicken nugget

"Em don't play with your food" Derek said as Emma then bit the head off her nugget

"I feel like that table keeps looking at us" Meredith said. Derek turned around and smiled

"Those would be the surgical floor nurses. They hate you" Derek said calmly

"What" Meredith said confused

"Well they all want me" Derek said

"Narcissistic much?" Meredith asked

"They've all hit on me, and I've turned all of them down and well here I am sitting and having lunch with you and well my daughter they didn't think actually exsisted"

"What do you mean actually exist?" Meredith laughed

"Well since I'm not interested in any of them, Mark thought the whole being a dad thing would help my cause and get them off my back. They thought I was making it up, apparently Em's pictures in my locker are pictures of my niece. But now they see her in the living flesh and well the very woman who at one point I dated" he chuckled

"Some things never change" Meredith giggled

* * *

_Flashback_

"_Derek I'm fine" Meredith said as she walked away from Derek "I'm going two aisles over" Meredith groaned. She was 8 months pregnant and was limited to time out of bed. She had managed to convince Derek to go to the store because they still needed things for the baby and Derek knowing she was nesting knew she would most likely cry if he didn't. She had been good all week so he figured an hour out of the house wouldn't hurt._

"_Fine but if it' something you can't reach call me" Derek sighed as he continued to look at the current aisle for food. With Meredith's hormones she was carving all sort of dishes at all times and he started to just have most things in stock at the apartment so he wouldn't have to drive out to get the ingredients. After 20 minutes and no sign of Meredith Derek wandered about in the direction where Meredith had ventured to. When he found her he smiled and casually browsed the aisle occasionally peeking over at Meredith who was intently reading the back of what looked to be like post natal vitamins. He couldn't help but smile; it was so cute watching Meredith nest. His thoughts were interrupted by a young woman standing next to him._

"_Centrum for Men over 50 huh?" The lady said to catch his attention "I'm pretty sure these don't apply to you"_

"_Just browsing" he smiled realizing she was trying to start small conversation and by the way she was batting her eyes and inching herself closer to him she was trying to get his attention as well _

"_Shit" he heard coming from where Meredith was. She had dropped the box and was trying to bend down to get it_

"_God I hope I don't look like that when I'm pregnant. She looks like a whale" The lady smirked. "I mean how am I supposed to keep a good looking man like yourself". Derek was disgusted by the woman._

"_Excuse me, but I need to go help the pregnant whale who happens to be my girlfriend who is 8 months pregnant with my baby" Derek said shortly before going to help Meredith. The lady stood there dumbfounded. Derek quickly went to Meredith's side helping her pick up the box she had dropped and kissed her cheek gently causing Meredith to smile. _

"_Who's she?" Meredith asked glancing over at the girl_

"_I don't know" Derek said as they left the aisle_

_End of Flashback_

* * *

"So you are the famous Meredith Grey and you must be Princess Emma" The man said greeting them as the entered the office

"Yes indeed. Meredith, Emma this is Chief Weller" Derek said

"Please take a seat," Chief Weller said sitting down at his own desk "Meredith I've heard so much about you"

"Good things I hope" Meredith smiled

"From what I take of all of it, you help keep this resident grounded because he can't fool around at work. He's here to work so he can provide for his child and her mother." Chief Weller explained. Meredith smiled

"Daddy what this?" Emma said leaving Meredith's lap to climb into her dad's as she reached out for his stethoscope

"And I've taken the liberty to do some research on you and I must say you are an exceptionally bright student. Perfect GPA, two years ahead of her class and having a young daughter you are an exceptional young lady. If you keep it up we would be glad to offer you an internship position here. Have you thought about programs?"

"I have a few in mind" Meredith said

"Well I hope we're one of the ones on the top" Chief Weller hoped

"Ideally yes, with Derek here it would make it a lot easier, but who knows where life will take us in the next year and a half. Depending on where I get in and what our life looks like at the time I have o make the best decision for both myself and my daughter" Meredith explained

"Well I hope to be seeing your application in the near future. Derek is one of the leading residents of his class and he claims you're even better than him. Derek has found a calling in Neurosurgery and you said yourself Neuro is something that sparks interest for you. Imagine that two of the best neurosurgeons working here at Mount Sinai Hospital together. That would just add to the already renowned reputation of this hospital." Chief Weller explained "Perhaps even have a third if she follows in her parents' footsteps" nodding at Emma who was listening to Derek's heart with his stethoscope. Derek smiled at the thought of him and Meredith working side by side. They had always made a good pair and his smile widened at just the idea of Emma becoming a surgeon as well.

* * *

_Every little thing that you have said and done_  
_Feels like it's deep within me_  
_Doesn't really matter if you're on the run_  
_It seems like we're meant to be_

"Oh Mer there's one more patient I want to see before I leave" Derek said as they were leaving the hospital. Derek had changed out of his scrubs and into his street clothes and they were on their way to get some dinner before heading back to Derek's apartment.

"Okay we will wait for you down at the lobby" Meredith said taking Emma's hand from Derek

"No, come with me" He smiled

"Are you sure, if this work—" Meredith started

"No more of a patient that I've had on my service for a while" Derek said guiding them towards the room.

"Mrs. Shaffer" Derek said entering the room of an elderly woman

"Dr. Shepherd" she smiled sitting up slightly

"Just checking up o you before I leave" Derek said

"I see you brought me some company," she said "and I'm going to guess this is miss Emma" she said

"Well I just wanted to check on you and while they're in town I figured you'd like to put faces to the beautiful ladies I always tell you about" Derek smiled picking up Emma before flipping open her chart to review it

"Yes, he would rather hang out in an old lady's room than with his gossiping 'immature' peers" Mrs. Shaffer laughed. They made some small talk, Mrs. Shaffer asked Meredith about Seattle and how school was going and verified some stories Derek told her about the times he and Meredith had dated. After about 30 minutes of chit chat Emma announced she had to use the bathroom. Meredith took her there and agreed to meet Derek at the lobby.

"We'll see you in about five minutes downstairs" Meredith told Derek "Bye Mrs. Shaffer, have a speedy recovery" Meredith addressed the woman

"Bye" Emma smiled as she left with her mom

"Now Dr. Shepherd are you sure you don't have feelings for this girl" Mrs. Shaffer asked "You seem to get a twinkle in your eye when you talk about her and now when you're with her you just have a sparkle in you. Anybody who doesn't know the situation would think you guys are a typical family unit" she smiled "she's something special and any man would be lucky to have her" she said. Derek smiled and wished her a goodnight and made his way to the lobby to meet Meredith and Emma. She was right, any man would be lucky to have Meredith, but he didn't want any man to have her. He wanted to have her in his life forever and that he knew was a fact, it was finding a way to convince Meredith that giving them a try was worth it.

_Who you are (who you are)_  
_Where you're from (where you're from)_  
_As long as you love me_  
_Who you are_  
_As long as you love me_  
_What you did (I don't care)_  
_As long as you love me_

* * *

**Please Review :)**


	12. Can You Feel The Love Tonight

**Can You Feel The Love Tonight**

**Elton John**

_There's a calm surrender to the rush of day_  
_When the heat of a rolling wind can be turned away_  
_An enchanted moment, and it sees me through_  
_It's enough for this restless warrior just to be with you_

"Oh the weather outside is frightful, but the fire is so delightful' Derek sang as he entered the apartment. He was coming home after a night shift. In order to get Thanksgiving off he had to work a lot of doubles the past week and he agreed to work a night shift that would end at 10am so he could have Thanksgiving lunch with his family.

"Derek, are you seriously singing Christmas songs?" Meredith yawned. She had gotten used to sleeping in since her semester break started and while it was 11am she was just getting her day started

"It is Thanksgiving which means it is now socially acceptable for me to sing Christmas songs and hang up Christmas lights" Derek chuckled handing her a coffee. This had become routine for them since Meredith had arrived. If he worked a night shift he always came back with her favorite Starbucks drink with a muffin and bring Emma back an apple juice and a donut.

"I swear you were Santa in a past life" Meredith giggled accepting the coffee "How are you not dead. You worked a night shift after a full day of taking Emma around New York. I'm exhausted and all I have done in the past two days is be a bum"

"Because it is Thanksgiving a day for spending with the ones you love. So I'm spending the day with you and Emma until we head to my moms house. I have activities and everything planned out"

"Well Emma is stuck in front of the TV until that parade ends" Meredith said nodding to where Emma was sitting in the living room

"I'm still upset I couldn't bring her to the actual parade" Derek sighed

"She's too young to remember anyways" Meredith laughed "Anyways do you really think I'd let you take her into such a large crowd?"

"Emma is all but passed out on your bed. She fell asleep mid-coloring a snowflake as there is now a blue marker stain on your sheets" Meredith laughed as she entered the media room. Derek had been watching some TV and was drifting in and out of sleep. They had a nice quiet lunch with just the three of them to hold them over for the feast Carolyn had been preparing for this evening.

"It'll come out" he yawned rubbing his temples

"Tired" Meredith said sitting next to him

"Hmmm yeah, but I also have had a headache. It's been on and off a few days" Derek said running his temples

"Probably because you won't just rest" Meredith said softly as she shifted closer to him "Come here" she said as she gently placed her hands on his head as he shift closer. "Lay" she said softly. Derek followed suit and sighed in relief when she began to massage his temples

"That feels like heaven" Derek murmured as he shut his eyes

"This was actually a class assignment once, learning techniques to ease headaches" Meredith said as she continued to massage his temples and head. It wasn't long before Meredith heard soft snores. Meredith smiled as she shifted so she could still run her finger through his hair and have a comfortable sitting position and soon drifted off to sleep on the couch too.

"Ugh" Derek groaned as he came out of his sleep. He opened his eyes and was slightly confused. He was had fallen asleep on what seemed to be the couch however he felt a form behind him and looked to his side a bit to see his head was resting on Meredith's stomach. The last thing he remembered was the relief Meredith's head massage was giving him

_And can you feel the love tonight_  
_It is where we are_  
_It's enough for this wide-eyed wanderer_  
_That we got this far_

"Must have fallen asleep" He said sitting up to find Meredith snoring "I guess she did too" he chuckled standing up and draping a blanket over Meredith which ended up wakening her.

"Hmmm" Meredith said "What time is it?" she asked as her eyes came to focus

"A bit before three" Derek said looking at his phone "We better start getting ready to go to my moms" he said cracking his back "You should think about being a head massager" he chuckled. They both made their way to Derek's room where they had left Emma to sleep

"I think she's growing again" Meredith sighed "She's been eating and sleeping like crazy lately"

"She's always been on the small size" Derek said "I mean she's almost four and barely wears a size 3"

"Well for the record, I'm a small person and you're not to big yourself" Meredith giggled "I mean Mark has a whole foot on you"

"Well great things come in small packages" Derek chuckled

* * *

_And can you feel the love tonight_  
_How it's laid to rest_  
_It's enough to make kings and vagabonds_  
_Believe the very best_

_"Mommy look!" Emma said giggling as she entered her grandmother's living room. Emma was getting along great with her cousins. Derek's sister couldn't' get enough of how much Emma looked like Derek_

"Wow" Meredith exclaimed looking at the make over Emma and her other girl cousins had given her doll

"Alright everybody Dinner is ready" Carolyn called. While Carolyn was finishing up dinner Derek and all of his sisters' husbands were watching TV while all the woman gossiped about the events going on in their lives.

"Food Time" Derek smiled as he put his hand on the small of Meredith's back and guided her and Emma to the family dinning room.

"Mom everything looks great" Amelia said

"And it smells amazing" Kathleen added as everybody made way to the food.

"You guys know the drill" Carolyn said swatting hands away from the plates "Every hold hands and stand around the table". Everybody quickly grabbed hands and smiled

"Are we playing ring around the rosy?" Emma asked causing everybody to laugh

"No Em" Derek chuckled "We are all going to say something we are thankful for, remember how we practiced at home"

"Oh yeah, but I forgot what I said" Emma said looking at her dad

"It's okay Emma you have time to think, this takes a while" Kathleen laughed

"What a year it has been for our family" Carolyn started "We've had our ups and downs but we're all still standing her together. I am thankful for every single one of you. While sometimes you guys make me so mad I wish I could strangle you, you also fill my life with so much joy and I cannot imagine what my life would be without any one of you here". Every smiled and the tradition went around the circle. Everybody talked about how thankful they were for their jobs, their health and other things. Jared, Nancy's youngest said he was grateful for the iPad because without it he'd be bored. Finally the circle made it's way to Meredith

"Well I'm thankful for you guys. I never had a family until you all came into my life. You guys really make me feel like I am part of the Shepherd clan, I know I can always rely on you guys to be there for me and Emma if we need any help. You guys aren't like family anymore, you are my family" Meredith smiled

"Meredith you are a crucial part of this family" Carolyn smiled. "Alright Emma it's your turn"

"I'm thankful for crayons because I can color pictures" Emma announced. Carolyn laughed, as hearing what her younger grandchildren try to participate was always interesting "Your turn daddy" Emma laughed

"Well I am thankful for all of you because all of you have made me the person I am today and I hope I make every single one of you proud. But one person I would really like to give a 'shout out' to" Derek's informal tone caused the group to laugh "is you Meredith. I know I've said this before but you have given me the best thing that has ever happened to me. Emma is my world and without you, she wouldn't be here. So thank you" He smiled grabbing her hand and squeezing it a bit

"Well thanks a lot Derek" said Tom, Kathleen's husband "way to raise the bar on the husband end over here" causing the group to burst out laughing. Meredith smiled at Derek and squeezed his hand acknowledging his little speech.

* * *

"Man she is out" Derek chuckled as he sat in the chair next to Meredith on his apartment balcony

"I'd be out too but I am not suffering the heart burn tomorrow of sleeping on a very full stomach" Meredith laughed. Meredith had always loved Carolyn's cooking, the lady just knew how to hit the right spot regarding her taste buds. Emma who rarely ate a whole plate of food had three helping the whole time she was at her grandmothers, Meredith lost count of how much she ate between the wonderful dinner Carolyn had made and the numerous wonderful desserts that followed the food coma.

"Aww see you are learning something in medical school" He said

"Aren't you funny" she said lightly hitting his arm before resting her arm next to his on the small coffee balcony table in-between them. They sat there quietly for a few moments listening to the busy New York Streets, Meredith taking in the New York night sky of lights. Meredith couldn't help but feel happy. She wasn't going to deny she enjoyed time with Derek. And while she was here in New York she felt like they were a unit and a real family. When she had ended things with Derek she did it out of caution, not because she didn't love him. She did, and not just because he was the father of her daughter but she loved him for just being Derek. Her thoughts were interrupted by Derek grabbing her hand—

"Meredith can I ask you something" Derek asked, his tone sweet but serious

"Umm yeah" Meredith said looking at him

"Have you ever thought about what it'd be like if we had decided to stay together" He asked "God I really hope this doesn't make the rest of your trip awkward, or if it does I'm sure if you want you could just stay at my moms—but ever since you and Emma arrived I can't help but feel like we have something, we've been basically living together and I still feel that connection-"

"So you feel it too" Meredith whispered

_Can you feel the love tonight?_  
_The peace the evening brings_  
_The world, for once, in perfect harmony_  
_With all its living things_

* * *

And so the story finally hits a turning point, what will they do now? Will they try again, settle for friends, and what does this mean for Emma? Review for more!


	13. Say You Will

**Say You Will**

**Fleetwood Mac**

_Somethin' in you brought out somethin' in me, that I've never been since_  
_That part of me that was only for you, _  
_That kind of romance_  
_Comes only once, that kind of love_  
_That kind of fever dance_  
_That you love because you become someone else in an instant_

"So you feel it too" Meredith whispered. It was almost like the world stopped as the two looked intently at each other scared to be the one to make the first move.

"I've always felt it, since the first time I ever saw you. When we broke up it wasn't because we no longer cared about each other" he started

"It was because we didn't have the time and effort to put into an us" Meredith said remembering how it all ended

"But I'm no longer a first year intern and you're no longer a first year university student and Emma is no longer an infant" Derek said "The circumstances have changed but my feelings for you haven't" he continued. Even though the street below them was bustling the pair were too lost in the gaze of each other. "I was devastated when we called a quits to us but I understood why, I mean we were both single for a year because what we had on our plates with a newborn was already full. But since then every person I dated didn't live up to you and what we had together. Gosh you've been here less than two weeks and already we've fallen into a routine like any regular family"

"I know" Meredith said "But Derek like you said the circumstances changed, we've both grown up a bit we've both changed and maybe the new us won't work together"

"But we won't know unless we give it another shot. We go back to square one and get to know each other" Derek said

"But if we do this, we have to make sure that if it doesn't work that it doesn't come back to hurt Emma" Meredith said

"I don't even think we should tell her until we know for sure if this going to be something or not" He said gripping her hand tight

"So what do we do now?" Meredith asked

"We get to know each other, we go back to square one. So Meredith Grey will you go out on a real date with me on Sunday?" He asked

"I don't know I don't date men with children" She giggled "but I guess I'll give you a chance." she said giving him a smile

* * *

_Say you will, say you will give me one more chance_  
_At least give me time to change your mind_  
_That always seems to heal the wounds, if I can_  
_Get you to dance_

Derek could wipe the smile off his face. It had been there since he and Meredith had said goodnight the previous night. Nothing had happened, not even a kiss but to Derek a second chance at them was worth a million dollars. He hummed Here Comes the Sun as he made pancake for his two leading ladies who were still fast asleep. Derek was fast asleep until his sister woke him up asking him for Emma's clothing size ad favorite toys as they were busy black Friday shopping. They had begged Meredith to go along with them but she said she'd rather pay full price than deal with crowds and lines and the parking, but the Shepherd sisters insisted that was what made the Black Friday experience

"Why are you up so early" Meredith yawned as she entered the kitchen with a blanket still wrapped around her

"Did I wake you?" Derek asked, "I know my humming and singing is a bit off tune, but for the record it's morning and my voice still tends to crack"

"No it was this aroma" Meredith smiled standing next to him and looking into the batter

"Good Morning" Derek smiled as gave her a small hug

"Good Morning" Meredith smiled resting her head on his chest

"Hmmm as much as I like you standing here, I don't want our breakfast to burn. If I remember correctly a hungry Meredith is a grumpy Meredith" he chuckled

"That would be correct" she laughed jumping up to sit on the counter next to Derek's mixing bowl

"Blueberry pancakes for me, chocolate chip banana for the princess and Strawberry Nutella for the lady" he said as he put toppings into the batter for each of them

"Extra nutella please" Meredith smiled as she took a strawberry out of the bowl and ate it getting a look from Derek

"What I'm hungry" Meredith giggled

_ Somethin' in you put a hold on my heart_  
_It's hard to believe now_  
_Here in the place that will never be dark_  
_I remember that place..._  
_That kind of touch, electricity of love_

* * *

"No Daddy you have to drink tea with your pinky up" Emma squealed as she corrected her dad

"Oh I'm sorry" Derek chuckled fixing his tiara. This is what he had always imagined. Derek had turned the office into a room for Emma during her stay. While he didn't install a bedroom set, the room how had pink and purple curtains, a princess rug and of course princess sheets for her to sleep on. But here he was sitting on the floor dressed in a tutu and a tiara with Meredith dressed similarly sitting on the floor next to him as they had tea time with their daughter and her stuffed animals.

"Mommy says nice girls hold their finger like this" Emma said demonstrating her pinky up technique

"Classy not trashy" Meredith giggled as Derek gave Meredith a puzzled look

"More momma?" Emma asked as she brought her pink plastic Disney teapot over to Meredith

"Yes please" Meredith said in a very polite tone. Emma smiled as she pretended to pout tea into Meredith's cup. It was very rare she could have time to sit and have a actually tea party with Emma. Half the time if she was having a tea party with Emma she had some study guide or book on the tea party table so she could still study at the same time. But Meredith loved this, her and Derek playing with their daughter. She smiled and took out her phone and turned on the front camera.

"Alright everybody, say Facebook" Meredith smiled as Emma and Derek smiled. She smiled at the picture and laughed at Derek's outfit of a Cinderella tiara with a large fluffy purple tutu on.

_Flashback_

"_Derek that is just too cute" a pregnant Meredith said as she waddled around the toy store. While ideally they knew their newborn wasn't going to playing with toys in the near future, they wanted to grab some stuffed animals for her nursery and Meredith just wanted out of the house since her doctor put her on strict bed rest with only an hour allowance to be active on her feet. _

"_I can't wait until she's old enough to start having tea parties and fashion shows in our living room" Derek smiled_

"_Because you're so into them" Meredith giggled_

"_Hey I will for out little princess" He said as he put his hand on her stomach feeling Emma kick boldly "I want to be the dad that runs around the house with a crown on his head playing dress up, the dad with mismatched horribly painted nails because his daughter wanted to give dad a manicure" Derek smiled_

"_You're going to be a great dad" Meredith smiled_

_End Flashback_

* * *

_Say you will, say you will give me one more chance  
At least give me time to change your mind  
That always seems to heal the wounds, if I can  
Get you to dance_

"Hi Mom" Derek said as he entered his childhood home. He gave his mother a kiss on the check before signing that Emma was asleep and he was going to let her sleep upstairs in his old bedroom.

"Meredith, how are you" Carolyn asked as she gave her a hug

"Still stuffed from yesterday" Meredith laughed, "I see others are still sleeping" she said as she noticed Derek's sisters asleep

"Yeah they came back from their midnight shopping adventures around 7 and by the time everything was unloaded out of the cars and put away so the kids couldn't see it was nine. Not that it's noon I should probably start lunch" Carolyn smiled

"Where are the men with the babies" Meredith giggled

"The kids woke up around 10, they had a small breakfast and the dad's took them to the park down the road, they'll be back soon" Carolyn said

"Hey mom" Derek said as he came back down the stairs "Do you want help with lunch" Derek asked

"Yes dear, why don't the two of you make the turkey sandwiches" she smiled as she walked them into the kitchen. It was a tradition that any leftovers were made into post Thanksgiving Day lunches that included turkey sandwiches from the turkey the day before.

_Say you will, say you will give me one more chance_  
_At least give me time to change your mind_  
_That always seems to heal the wounds, if I can_  
_Get you to dance_

"So Derek what has gotten you into such a good mood son? Carolyn asked as she and Derek went to clear the table. Emma was out playing with her cousins out in the backyard on the swing set and slide Carolyn had installed and Meredith was with Derek's sisters in talking up a storm in the living room.

"Nothing" Derek smiled

"Derek Christopher I'm am you're mother, I know when something is up" Carolyn laughed

"If I tell you, you can't tell anybody. Not even Meredith" Derek said softly to his mother

"What dear?" her face becoming a bit more serious

"After dinner last night, Meredith and I were out on the patio and we were just sitting their quietly and talking" Derek said "And one topic led to the next and we found ourselves in a quite a serious conversation about our life. We've decide maybe we should try again for a relationship"

"Oh that is great news Derek" Carolyn said

"I mean we aren't for sure yet if we will be something but we agreed to get to know each other again. I mean we are very different people now, we've grown up a bit and last time we called it off because we just didn't have the time to put into a real relationship with all that we had on our plates at the time"

"It's about time" Carolyn smiled hugging her son.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Derek chuckled

"Oh baby Der, I've noticed since the day Meredith has walked into your life how your eyes get a sparkle and your smile gets wider. Derek when you moved out here you guys had basically a long distance relationship. You guys talked and texted everyday about everything. It's about time" Carolyn smiled. She didn't want to tell Derek that she knew Meredith was it for him, it'd be too much pressure. She was happy for both of them and for her granddaughter.

_Say you will, say you will give me one more chance_  
_At least give me time to change your mind_  
_That always seems to heal the wounds, if I can_  
_Get you to dance_

* * *

Well What do you think? Soon our lovebirds get to know each other again


	14. Everything Has Changed

**Everything Has Changed**

**Taylor Swift**

_All I knew this morning when I woke_  
_Is I know something now, know something now I didn't before._  
_And all I've seen since eighteen hours ago_  
_Is green eyes and freckles in your smile_  
_In the back of my mind making me feel right_

"And I think to myself" Derek belted out in the car "what a wonderful world". It was only a few das after Thanksgiving and Derek had just finished a night shift. He was tired but he was much too excited to spend his day with Meredith. Today was going to be their 'second first date' as Derek called it himself. It felt odd saying this was their first date, seeing the history they have together but technically it was their first date for the new them. He was going to go home, shower and take a nap before heading to Kathleen's house where Meredith and Emma were. Kathleen asked if Emma wanted to play with her cousins and Derek took the opportunity to make a date with Meredith with free babysitting. So far only his mother and Kathleen knew about him and Meredith dating again and Kathleen only knew because she had pestered Derek about why she couldn't spend a day with Meredith while Emma was over. After Derek finally spilled his secret Kathleen was more than happy for the two and respected that they wanted to keep it a secret for a while before they knew exactly what was going to happen. But Derek knew that this wasn't going to be kept a secret for too long, his sisters couldn't stop gossiping if their lives depended on it.

"So do you know what you guys are doing?" Kathleen asked as she watched Meredith put her hair up in a ponytail

"It's Derek, he never told me what we were doing when first dated" Meredith giggled, "All he told me was to dress casual and comfortable"

"Well that means… god who knows, it's Derek we never know what that boy is up to" Kathleen laughed

"Seriously" Meredith laughed with her. It wasn't long before they heard the doorbell ring

"Who is that?" Kathleen said sarcastically as she went to the door to reveal Derek standing at the front door

"Hi I'm here to pick up Meredith" Derek said casually holding a box of truffles

"Derek get inside the house" Kathleen laughed gently hitting Derek on the shoulder

"Hey" Meredith smiled as she reached the door

"You ready to go?" Derek asked as he kissed her on the cheek

"Yeah" Meredith said

"Alright you too" Kevin, Kathleen's husband, said as he appeared from the kitchen "No farther than first base, and curfew is at 10 o'clock" he lectured in his fatherly tone

"Yes Dad" Meredith giggled as Derek led her out of the house

"These are for you" Derek said as he buckled his seatbelt

"Chocolate truffles" Meredith smiled

"I thought about flowers, but you're not the flower type girl" Derek chuckled as he started the car

"I think it's safe to say I'm not the typical girly girl" She laughed, "I had pink hair through high school, wore all black not the blonde preppy girl with the skirts and the floral dresses"

"You were the only girl I dated that didn't require a full Romeo" Derek chuckled

_I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now  
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now_

_Flashback_

_Meredith laid on her bed singing along to the new CD she had purchased earlier on her shopping trip with a few girls in the Pre-Med organization at school. While Malls weren't her thing, Meredith knew she and to at least try to make friends other than her crazy crew she hung out with now which included a hardcore Christina, frat boy Alex, trailer park model girl and sensitive George. She heard tapping at her window and groaned at the thought of having to get up from her comfortable position. She was about ready to tell off the person who was disturbing her when her eyes went wide as she saw Derek strumming a guitar and singing a ballad to her. _

"_Derek what are you doing?!" She said in shock_

"_Serenading you" Derek said slightly confused at his new girlfriend. He had officially asked her a week ago and Meredith laughed saying that she already considered them official. _

"_Derek Christopher" Meredith said noticing people standing around Derek "Get inside" she exclaimed. Five Minutes later Derek was in Meredith's bedroom in her apartment she shared with Christina._

"_What are you doing" Meredith giggled as she sat in Derek's lap. Derek was confused as he was being scolded earlier outside_

"_I was being romantic" Derek said confused "Oh and those are for you" he said pointing at the flowers and chocolate he had left on her desk on his way in. Meredith laughed and then kissed him softly_

"_Let's get this straight" she giggled "I'm not the girly girl girlfriend that expects flowers and serenading…I like chocolate though" she smiled_

"_Hmmmmm" Derek said breathing her in as he kissed the top of her head "I've never had a girlfriend tell me that before, usually they're asking for more" he chuckled "You are something else Meredith" . Meredith just smiled and gave him another kiss_

"_Hmm maybe this time you're relationship will last" she giggled "now go get me a chocolate" she said gently poking at his chest with every word_

_End of Flashback_

_I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now  
I just wanna know you, know you, know you_

* * *

_'Cause all I know is we said, "Hello."  
And your eyes look like coming home  
All I know is a simple name  
Everything has changed  
All I know is you held the door  
You'll be mine and I'll be yours  
All I know since yesterday is everything has changed_

"So where are we going?" Meredith asked as Derek merged onto the freeway

"Have I ever once told me where we were going on dates?" Derek smirked. Meredith just rolled her eyes and put a truffle in her mouth before feeding Derek one

"Thanks" Derek smiled as he finished off the truffle "We're almost there"

"We're on Staten Island" Meredith noted. After a bit of traffic Derek parked the car at a park parking lot

"We're at a park?" Meredith questioned

"Yes" Derek said as he came around to open her door. He helped her out of the car before walking to the trunk of the SUV where he pulled out a blanket and a basket "I hope you're hungry, I packed all of your favorites"

"A picnic" Meredith smiled as she took his hand and he led her down the trail to a spot that overlooked the water and the ferryboats

"So have you thought about the programs you are going to apply to?" Derek asked as they had their lunch. Derek had made Meredith's favorite picnic lunch, a light Caesar salad and a roast beef sandwich

"Still thinking Seattle Grace, and Mount Sinai but I think I'll apply to California as well" She said

"I'm sure you'll get it wherever you apply to" Derek smiled. While it would make him the happiest if she chose to relocate to New York, he also understood why she would want to stay in Seattle. Emma grew up in Seattle and Meredith didn't want to uproot her if she didn't have to especially given Meredith's past of Ellis moving a young Meredith across country.

"Have you thought about what you're going to do if Emma and I stay in Seattle or move to God knows where?" Meredith asked

"I do want us to be closer, the past year has worked but it's been tough. I miss having you guys around all the time" Derek smiled "I'm sure my attending would help me find a position wherever you decide to go. Now time for dessert" he said unpacking the last contents of the basket

"Cheesecake and chocolate covered strawberries" Meredith said excitedly "All of my favorites. So far the best date I've had in a while"

"I'm glad to hear" Derek smiled

_And all my walls stood tall painted blue  
And I'll take them down, take them down and open up the door for you_

_And all I feel in my stomach is butterflies  
The beautiful kind, making up for lost time,  
Taking flight, making me feel right_

They ended their picnic by feeding each other chocolate strawberries before Derek drove them up to the dock for a ferryboat ride. They talked a lot about the things that have changed over the year that they've been separated by the coast but also talked about the nearing future. All Derek knew is that if today's lunch date was any indicator of how the rest of this relationship would be, they were off to a fantastic start. A few things have changed but deep down the Meredith and Derek from four years ago still had that special spark. Once the boat had docked they still had some time left before they needed to head back to pick up Emma so Derek and Meredith just took a stroll on the trail that ran parallel to the shoreline of the island

"This was nice" Meredith said licking her strawberry ice cream. They had passed an ice cream parlor and Derek went in and bought himself coffee ice cream and Meredith a strawberry scoop

"Yes is was" he said squeezing her hand as he went in and stole a lick of strawberry ice cream

"Hey" Meredith giggled as she took a lick of his coffee ice cream "Ick, coffee is for drinking not for ice cream form" she laughed

"So I was thinking, since I'm off Wednesday and my mom wanted all the grandkids to have a grandkids night at her house, why don't we go out for some dinner maybe hit up Harold Square and start picking presents for the family" He said stopping and sitting on the park bench that overlooked the ferryboat ride just leaving the dock for another tour

"Our first date hasn't even ended yet and you are already planning the second?" Meredith said raising her eyebrow "what happened to the three day rule or whatever you and Mark used to say back in the day?"

"I didn't even follow the three day rule with you if I recall. I way over the moon after our first date I texted you about a second date less than 24 hours later. Mark said I'd scare you off but it didn't" he chuckled

"Wednesday sounds good. Emma has already seen the toys r us catalog and is already circling things" Meredith laughed. Meredith had fully enjoyed the lunch date and couldn't wipe the grin over her face. Yes everything had changed in their lives since the last time they were a couple but all she knew is that there was something still there and part of her knew that her love for Derek had never gone away. But she knew for sure now their relationship had changed once again and perhaps for the better.

_'Cause all I know is we said, "Hello."_  
_And your eyes look like coming home_  
_All I know is a simple name_  
_Everything has changed_  
_All I know is you held the door_  
_And you'll be mine and I'll be yours_  
_All I know since yesterday is everything has changed_

* * *

Please let me know what you think. They're officially dating again but every relationship has their ups and downs.


	15. Over My Head

**Over My Head**

**The Fray**

_I never knew_

_I never knew that everything was falling through_

_That everyone I knew was waiting on a cue_

_To turn and run when all I needed was the truth_

* * *

"Emma Stop" Meredith scolded as she pushed the cart through the grocery store

"No. I want it" Emma screamed bringing attention to them. It had been a terrible morning. While Derek had been away at work for most of the day, Emma was pushing all of Meredith's buttons and had countless amount of meltdowns today. Meredith had let in the first few times, but by lunchtime Meredith had had enough. She pin pointed it down to the fact that since they've arrived she's been spoiled rotten by Derek's family and Meredith didn't want to upset her when they first arrived so she let her get away with a more than she should have.

"Emma" Meredith said more sternly

"Meredith it's just a doll toy, I'll get it" Derek said

"No Derek" Meredith said removing the doll toy from the cart which caused Emma to start a tantrum

"I WANT THE DOLLY" Emma cried. Derek looked at Meredith who pulled Emma out of the cart.

"We will be outside when you're done checking out" Meredith sighed as she carried a kicking and screaming Emma out of the store. Derek frowned and gave a meek smile at the people who were looking at them

_But that's how it's got to be_

_It's coming down to nothing more than apathy_

_I'd rather run the other way than stay and see_

_The smoke and who's still standing when it clears_

When Derek went to meet them at the car Emma was still screaming and crying and Derek couldn't get her to sit still to buckle her up in the car

"Emma Grace you have to three to cut it out or you will be out of the car and Daddy and I will go home without you because nobody wants a screaming baby" Meredith said in her stern mommy tone "One…Two…Three". Emma looked at her mother and continued her cries.

"Derek start the car" Meredith sighed as she took Emma out of the car and placed her on the side curb that they had parked next to. Meredith turned to walk over to the passenger's side and Derek gave her a shocked look only to hear Emma's next cries

"No Mommy" Emma cried. Meredith smiled as she heard Emma cry out again, "Don't leave me Mommy". Meredith turned around; her face went back to emotionless as she bent down to Emma's level

"Are you done screaming?" Meredith asked

"Yes" Emma sniffled as she gave her mother a hug. Meredith hugged her daughter before buckling her up in the car

"You know we could have just bought the doll" Derek said as he navigated the car through the busy streets

"No, she needs to understand she isn't going to get everything she wants" Meredith said "She's been like this all morning, I think she's being spoiled a bit too much"

"Hey now, I haven't seen her in almost a year and neither has my family, I think she deserves some treats" Derek said

"Some. But ever since we got here she's gotten what she's wanted right and left, even I'm guilty of it but she needs to know that there are boundaries"

"A few toys aren't going to spoil her"

"Derek, did you not just see what happened at the store, that is how a spoiled three year old acts. Anyways you wouldn't understand, as I will be the one having to deal with all of it when we go home after Christmas". Derek felt the tension in the car and while he did want to spoil his little girl he knew he shouldn't. He knew that his want to buy her toys and everything she wanted was coming from the guilt of him being there with her for the past year. He could sense Meredith felt the tension too. He took a glance at her and smiled getting a meek smile from her then reached for her hand on the console and squeezed it gently as he continued the drive back to his apartment.

* * *

_Everyone knows I'm in_

_Over my head_

_Over my head_

_With eight seconds left in overtime_

_She's on your mind_

_She's on your mind_

"Daddy I don't like that" Emma said from her booster seat at the kitchen table

"Emma you love lasagna" Meredith said. Emma shook her head

"I want ice cream" Emma whined. Since the grocery incident Derek witnessed first hand what Meredith was talking about. Emma had been very whiny and demanding the whole day

"You may have it after you eat your dinner" Derek said sternly. Emma was caught off guard at her dad's tone and looked at him

"Want ice cream now!" Emma shouted shoving her plate so that the lasagna ended up all over the table and the plate almost slid off. Meredith looked at Derek, looking to see if she should step in. He held his hand out to signal that he had it under control.

"Well then you are going to bed and Mommy and I will see you in the morning" Derek said lifting Emma out of the chair. Emma screamed and cried as Derek changed her into her pajamas, which was a feat in itself, and he put her in her bed and shut the door.

"Holy Crap" Derek sighed as he emerged in the kitchen to find Meredith already clearing Emma's mess "I'm the father of a little crazy person"

"Get used to it" Meredith laughed, "Now eat your dinner I want to watch a movie"

"Bossy" Derek chuckled "I like it"

After Derek had finished eating and Meredith had put away leftovers and cleaned Emma's mess they made their way to Emma's room. Her cries hadn't had lasted too long after Derek had left her in her room so the two wanted to make sure she was okay.

"Well look at that" Derek said revealing a sleeping Emma with a tear stained face.

"Movie time it is" Meredith whispered heading towards the living room

"Let's watch in my room, my back is killing me and I'm pretty sure it will kill me if I lounge on the couch for two hours" Derek chuckled. Meredith smiled and walked towards his room.

"Is it always like this?" Derek asked as they were cuddled together on his bed watching a movie

"What?" Meredith asked looking up at him

"Emma? Is she always screaming like that?" he asked

"Derek Emma has a late onset of terrible two's. It's the terrible three's. One minute she's fine, then at the flip of the switch she goes to full tantrum mode if she doesn't get what she wants. She's kick and scream and yell, she'll say she doesn't love you and then 10 minutes later she is telling you you're the best mommy in the world and she's your little princess again" Meredith explained

"I feel like I've missed out on these little things, or at least its different when you hear about it rather than actually be there when it happens" Derek sighed

"But no matter what she still thinks I'm the best mommy in the world and you're the best daddy in he world" Meredith smiled

"I've missed this" Derek smiled

"What?" she asked

"Laying here with you talking, cuddling and watching movies. It feels right" he smiled. they gazed into each other's eyes for a moment before slowly the space between them got smaller and their lips were touching. It was like sparks. The kiss was slow and lingering but it was magical.

"Hmmmm" Derek smiled "that I definitely missed. Meredith smiled and relaxed into his embrace as they finished their movie

* * *

_Let's rearrange_

_I wish you were a stranger I could disengage_

_Just say that we agree and then never change_

_Soften a bit until we all just get along_

"Daddy" Emma said causing Derek to stir from his sleep "Mommy?" The still half asleep three year old said confused

"Em" Meredith said coming out of her sleep

"I'm hungry" Emma said holding her stomach "my belly hurts"

"That's because somebody didn't get to eat dinner" Derek said getting up from the bed

"Let's go get something to eat" Meredith said getting up 'You can sleep" Meredith said to Derek

"No, I think I'll have food too" Derek said picking up Emma "I didn't get to eat so much earlier. Maybe I'll have a banana"

The three walked through the dark apartment to the kitchen where Meredith reheated the lasagna from dinner and Derek grabbed a banana for himself.

"Mommy" Emma said as she ate

"Yes Em" Meredith said wiping the sauce off of Emma's face

"Why were sleeping in Daddy's bed?" Emma asked innocently. Derek chocked on the water he had been drinking and Meredith, caught off guard, stumbled through her answer

"Uh well Em… actually… no… you know how sometimes Aunt Christina sleeps in Mommy's room at home, or Aunt Izzy?" Meredith asked

"Yeah when you have a sleepover?" Emma nodded

"Yes" Meredith said "we were having a sleepover"

"Did you guys watch a movie and do each others nails?" Emma giggled

"Well we watched a movie but we didn't do each others hair or nails" Meredith laughed, relieved that Emma was satisfied with her answer "Daddy doesn't get his hair or nails done silly, he's a boy"

"But Daddy lets me paint his nails" Emma giggled

"That's because you're my special girl. You're the only girl that is allowed to put glitter on me and to paint my nails" Derek chuckled

"But you get your hair done too Daddy" Emma said in her adult like tone "Mommy says it takes you so long to get ready because you put so much gel in your hair". Meredith giggled and Derek gave Meredith a little pretend glare

"Do you want to have a sleepover with us?" Derek asked

"Yes!" Emma shouted excitedly "Can we do each other's hair?" Emma said who was now wide-awake

"Emma it's 1 in the morning" Meredith yawned

"Well I'm awake, and you are awake" Derek said to Emma "Mommy's just an old lady who wants to go to sleep early" Derek smirked

"Hey" Meredith said, "I take offense to that, and for the record you're older than me. You're an old man"

* * *

_But that's disregard_

_Find another friend and you discard_

_As you lose the argument in a cable car_

_Hanging above as the canyon comes between_

_Ring ring ring…._

Derek's phone buzzed on the nightstand

"Hello?" Derek grumbled into the phone

"Derek where are you?" the voice on the other end said

"Morning Ma" Derek said a little less grouchy

"I thought you and Meredith were coming over with Emma for a Saturday morning breakfast with some of your sisters

"We are" Derek said trying to get up from the bed but Meredith was cuddled up to his shoulder and Emma was sleeping in-between them and he didn't want to disturb them.

"Derek it's ten o'clock are you guys on the way" Carolyn said

"Crap" Derek said looking at the clock on his nightstand "We're not going to make it. Is everybody still going to the picnic lunch charity thing at the hospital later?"

"I think so" Carolyn said

"We will see you guys there. Sorry Ma, we had a late night and I guess I forgot to turn on my alarm"

"Alright dear, we will see you guys later" Carolyn said as they ended their call

"Who is that" Meredith said groggily

"Mom, we over slept… we slept through breakfast at my moms" Derek yawned

"What time is it?" Meredith asked moving Emma so she could free herself from the bed.

"A little past eleven, we'll just meet up with everybody at the charity lunch at the hospital" Derek said

"Well I better start getting ready now" Meredith said getting up, Derek doing the same. Meredith suddenly busted out in a giggle as she took a look at Derek whose hair was sticking up in all directions with a blue bow in his hair. After their midnight snack Meredith let them have a sleepover and Emma wanted to do hair. While Meredith had given Emma a nice braid, Emma's hair skills weren't as good. She had managed to knot Meredith's hair but Derek's was the interesting one. She had convinced her dad to let her put gel in his hair and she spiked it up everywhere and to finish off her masterpiece she had but a large sequence blue bow on top of his head.

"What?" Derek said wondering why Meredith was giggling so hard. She couldn't stop laughing and just grabbed his hand and lead him to the bathroom where she turned on the light and let him look at himself in the mirror

"Jesus" Derek chuckled

"You're going to need to deep condition that mane of yours to get all of that gel out." Meredith said touching his stiffened hair.

_Everyone knows I'm in_

_Over my head_

_Over my head_

_With eight seconds left in overtime_

_She's on your mind_

_She's on your mind_

* * *

Please review! Thank you to all of those who continue to review each chapter, it really helps the writing process.


	16. 22

**22**

**Taylor Swift**

_It feels like a perfect night to dress up like hipsters_  
_And make fun of our ex's, uh uh, uh uh._  
_It feels like a perfect night for breakfast at midnight_  
_To fall in love with strangers, uh uh, uh uh._

"I can't believe you kept all of this" Meredith smiled going through memory boxes on Derek's bed "Such a girly thing to do"

"Hey" Derek smirked as he changed into some comfortable clothing. It was a little after eleven in the morning but after breakfast at his moms house and leaving Emma with his sister Derek and Meredith returned home and back into their loungewear. The bonus of Kathleen and his mom knowing that they were going to try to be a couple again was that they were more than willing to take Emma off their hands for a few hours so they could have alone time to be more reacquainted.

"Seriously Derek, you have letters and notes from your ex girlfriends from high school in here" Meredith said opening one "Dear Derek, I can't believe it's only been three days since I left for summer with my family. I miss you so much blah blah blah love honey bear" Meredith mimicked before bursting out into a giggle fit

"You tease me but you won't make fun of this one" Derek said as he reached into his closet and pulled out a bigger box. Meredith took the box from him and placed it on the bed along with all the other stuff she had pulled out of the smaller box that contained letters from girlfriends during his highschool years. "I like your shirt by the way" he smirked. Meredith was wearing his old Bowden shirt. They had fallen into a little routine. After Emma was asleep they'd sneak off to his room and sleep. One night Meredith forgot to the laundry and didn't have any clean sleeping clothes and borrowed one of Derek's instead and since then she found herself lounging around in his old shirts he kept around.

"It's really comfy and its scent reminds me someone special" she said as she opened the box. She smiled when she recognized its contents. She pulled out a few pictures and smiled

"I remember this day" she said as she pulled out a small stuffed bear with a picture of the two of them at a fair when Meredith was a young undergrad student. It was one of their first few dates they had and Derek remembered it like it was yesterday…

_I don't know about you_  
_But I'm feeling 22_  
_Everything will be alright_  
_If you keep me next to you_  
_You don't know about me_

_Flashback_

_"Gosh Meredith you're all wide eyed like a little kid. It's like you've never been to a fair before" Derek teased only to see Meredith's face of curiosity turn into a slight frown as they walked towards the ticket booth "Mer what's wrong?" he said noticing the change in mood_

_"I've never been to a fair" She said softly. Derek almost kicked himself. He knew who her mother was and that she was never around. They've had a few deep conversations about her childhood, or rather her lack of and he felt so bad for teasing her_

_"I'm sorry Mer" Derek started "I didn't mean—"_

_"It's okay Derek" Meredith smiled "Because now my first memory of being at a fair is going to be with you" Derek pulled her closer to him and they continued walking towards the midway game area._

_"And I am going to make sure that you have the best fair day ever" Derek smiled._

_After a full day of fair foods, rides and shows Derek and Meredith were walking around until the firework show that evening_

_"Wait a second" Derek said spotting a game booth "No fair day is complete until you win a prize from a game" he said pulling her towards a game_

_"One game please?" Derek said handing the man a 5 dollar bill_

_"Alright sir, all you have to do is knock down all the blocks" the booth handler said_

_"Let's see how all those years invested in baseball will pay off" Derek chuckled. Three throws later Derek was a winner. The man handed him a small stuffed a bear and Derek smiled and handed it to Meredith_

_"You won it" Meredith laughed_

_"But I won it for you" Derek said handing it to her. Meredith smiled as they neared the entrance for the firework show_

_"Hi guys" the girl at the Ferris wheel entrance said_

_"Hi" Meredith smiled_

_"Are you guys on the way to the firework show?" she asked kindly_

_"Yes" Derek said_

_"Well we only let a few people on the Ferris Wheel during the show, we're looking for someone to fill our last seats. Would like to watch the shows while on the Wheel?"_

_"Yeah, that'd be nice" Derek said_

_"Well come right this way" she said_

_A few minutes later Meredith and Derek were at the top of the Ferris Wheel watching fireworks light up the night sky._

_"It's so beautiful" Meredith said as she rested her head on Derek's shoulder_

_"Yes you are" Derek said bringing her chin up so he was looking into her eyes "Mer, today has been perfect and I've been trying to find the right moment to ask you, but I'm pretty sure this is it… go steady with me?" Derek asked. Meredith smiled_

_"I'm not sure I date boys who ask me to go 'steady' but since you won me a bear and all" she said before kissing him softly "and in case you didn't get that, yes I will go steady with you" she giggled_

_End of Flashback_

_But I'll bet you want to  
Everything will be alright  
If we just keep dancing like we're  
22_

"This is a box of all of our memories" Meredith said realizing that the entire box contained was little bits and pieces of their past. "I got a whole box and you shoved all your other girlfriends in a little box together" Meredith giggled

"I told you, you're special" he said kissing her softly

"Now let's talk about why you kept the love letters from the other girls" Meredith teased

"Actually my mom found it and wanted to keep it for memories but ran out of space at her storage place and demanded I keep that box. Our box however has always been with me by choice, even with Tiffany" Derek smiled

"So are we just having a lazy day?" Meredith said closing the box and climbing into Derek's lap as they both sat on the bed

"Hmmm I was going to have a lazy day, but I just got an idea" Derek said

"An idea huh" Meredith said playing with his hair

"More like a surprise, we'll have lunch and then dress in something comfy we're going out"

"I hate surprises"

"You'll like this one" he smiled

"Where are we going?" Meredith said fidgeting in the car. They had been driving for nearly an hour and Derek refused to tell her were he was taking her

"We are almost there" Derek laughed taking her hand in his as he returned his focus on the road. A few minutes later Derek smiled and pointed out the window

"That is where we're going" He said

"Are you serious?" Meredith giggled as she saw a Ferris Wheel

"Yup we are spending this afternoon on the boardwalk. It's kind of like a fair" Derek said

"Hmmm the last time I went to a fair, it was with this boy" Meredith giggled "he won me a bear and asked me to go steady with him"

"Sounds like a great guy" Derek chuckled

"How do eat this junk" Derek said looking at the food Meredith had gotten

"As I recall, a few years ago you said 'you can't go to a fair without having something unhealthily fattening'" she said mimicking him "Now eat a fried oreo" she said putting the fork to his mouth as he reluctantly accepted "Now tell me that doesn't taste good" she said taking a bite as well

"It's good but so unhealthy" Derek chuckled kissing her softly on the lips "but it taste even better off of you"

"It's starting to get chilly" Meredith said as she snuggled closer to Derek. They had played a few games Derek won Meredith a large stuffed puppy and was able tot win Emma a large Hello Kitty toy "Em is going to love this" Meredith said cuddling with the large Hello Kitty

"Well we have one more thing to do" Derek said helping her stand up before grabbing the large stuffed puppy

"Hmm?" Meredith said snuggling closer to him as they walked hand in hand down the boardwalk

"Well we can't leave without going on the Ferris Wheel" He smiled as they made their way towards the ride entrance. "Two please, well and two stuffed animals" Derek chuckled. The ride attendant took their tickets and wished them a fun ride as they got into their car and closed the door. Slowly the ride began and Meredith was in awe of the sight in front of her

"Wow, New York is so pretty from up here" she said

"If you can get away from all of the hustle and bustle we have beautiful architecture and scenery" Derek said as he began to point out a few key landmarks from their view "But who needs this, I'd rather stare at you all day" he smiled as he began to kiss her slowly. Quickly things started to get heated and Meredith had to pull away

"Derek" she moaned into his mouth "we need to stop"

"Sorry" he chuckled pulling away "I get carried away kissing you I guess"

"I'm not complaining but we are in public" she giggled "We do no look like we're young teenagers, we can't get away with that much public display of affection without getting stares"

"I feel like a teenager again. making out with my girlfriend on the Ferris Wheel" he chuckled

_It feels like one of those nights,_  
_We ditch the whole scene_  
_It feels like one of those nights,_  
_We won't be sleeping_

* * *

**Sorry for the delay, lie got a bit crazy the past few weeks! So this is mostly a filler/fluff as we transition into big questions and hurdles for our favorite couple.**


	17. Better Left Unsaid

**Better Left Unsaid**

**Araina Grande**

_I told you once, "Get out my life._  
_I don't need ya, I'll be alright."_  
_But some things are better left unsaid._

Meredith sat there and stared at the multiple papers that scattered in front of her. It was time to really start thinking about her internship. She had a few applications in front of her and an envelope. She picked up the envelope and took a deep breathe before opening it

_Miss Grey,_

_We were happy to receive your application for priority application for internship. Your application has been approved for final submission and we will be in contact with you shortly in regards of the final process. We have attached the forms that will be required for the final part of this process. Please have all forms postmarked no later than December 31__st__._

_Anna Richards_

_Seattle Grace Internship Coordinator_

"Oh my gosh" Meredith said. She had done the early application not thinking she would be good enough to make the elite program. The priority application, if she was admitted, would earn her a guaranteed internship and residency at Seattle Grace. The fact that she was in the process of being a finalist was amazing. Suddenly Meredith frowned. If she got priority it would binding, meaning she would have to go to Seattle Grace at that point. She and Derek had talked about her internship and she knew that he wanted her to move out to New York if she was able to take an internship there. While he had said many times he was open to her applying anywhere, she knew what he wanted. She looked at the New York application and sighed, they had a good internship program but it wasn't as good as Seattle Grace and the last thing she wanted to do was uproot Emma from the only place she's ever known. Meredith remembered the day that her mother had all but picked her up and moved her across the country. That day changed not only her life but also her as an individual. Priority guaranteed Meredith the best training and job opportunity as well as job security and would keep Emma grounded in Seattle.

Meredith was so deep in thought that she didn't realize Derek had come home until he hugged her from behind.

"What you doing?" Derek said breathing her in and glancing at her paper

"Uh reviewing internship applications" Meredith said turning in her chair to kiss him

"Daddy!" Emma shouted hearing her dad had come home. Derek quickly pulled away from Meredith before Emma had entered the room.

"Hi Princess" Derek smiled picking her up and twirling her around before putting her in Meredith's lap only to tickle her

"Daddy stop" Emma giggled, "it tickles" she squirmed in Meredith's arms who was now tickling her along with Derek "stop" she shrieked with a few more squirms accidently knocking over Meredith's papers

"opps" Emma said trying to get down off Meredith to pick up the papers

"I got it" Derek said picking up the papers glancing at one had flown off the table the farthest "Seattle Grace Priority Internship Application" he read before looking at Meredith

"I'm hungry" Emma said innocently unaware of the sudden tension in the room as Meredith and Derek just looked at each other

"Were you planning on telling me or just saying oh by the way change of plans I'm not even going to try to apply to a New York hospital" Derek said with a raised tone

"Derek I don't want to discuss this right now" Meredith said calmly

"We need to talk about this" He said

"We can discuss this later when Emma is asleep" She said raising her eyebrow as if asking him to challenge her. Derek sighed and nodded knowing it was the appropriate time for them to discuss the topic.

_So tell the truth, and hit me hard_  
_A broken heart is all I have now_  
_But some things are better left unsaid_

* * *

"Well" Derek said entering the living room area where Meredith was watching TV after he had put Emma down for bed. Meredith took a deep breath before turning to face him

"I was going to tell you" She said quietly

"When?" Derek asked sitting down next to her, keeping a little bit of distance between them.

"When you got home, and Emma was asleep. So technically, right now" Meredith sighed

"You should have told me when you applied"

"I really didn't think I was going to get it" Meredith said "I should have told you"

"No shit" Derek said "Meredith this isn't just about you. This is about all of us"

"Our professor made it sound like it was a good idea, and it is. Seattle has the strongest field of interns and the best surgeons in the world work there. I'd be able to learn from the best, to be the best."

"This isn't just about you though. What about me, what about Emma. What happened to moving out here and trying to at least function as a single unit instead of cross country"

"As far as Emma is concerned in this, I partially applied because of her. I don't want to keep moving around Derek. If I get priority I'm guaranteed residency and fellowship there. There'd be no wondering if we have to pick up and leave and move across the country when I finish my internship or my residency." Meredith said raising her voice to match his increasing volume. "As far as us being all together, why don't you try to move out east after your residency. I mean I don't understand why you're so hell bent on me and Emma having to move"

"Because I'm settled here Mer. I have a great job and my family is here, Emma's family is here"

"She has a family in Seattle too" Meredith defended

"her actual family, like blood" Derek argued

"Family is not defined by who has similar DNA and you know that" Meredith said now offended by his statement "Look at my mother and my father"

"Meredith when it comes down to it, they are just your classmates. Hell half of you will graduate and never talk again. For all you know, they just hang out with you for your brains" Derek said. Meredith just about lost it at that point.

"You know what, I can't talk about this with you right now. I'm going to check on Emma" Meredith said leaving the room. Tear burned her eyes but she wouldn't let them fall. "And for the record" she started as she turned away from him "They were the people that were there for me when you couldn't be. They were the people who helped me when Emma needed something and I couldn't get to her" and with that she left the room and went into Emma's room.

* * *

_And I swore that I would never say_  
_I miss you more every day_  
_But some things are better left unsaid_  
_Are better left unsaid, said, said..._

After calming down Meredith tiptoed into the living room where she fell asleep watching TV on the couch. Derek was having trouble sleeping, something just didn't feel right so he went to get a glass of water. He made his way to the kitchen, passing through the living area and frowned. He assumed Meredith was sleeping in Emma's room. He knew he had lost his cool earlier. It was something he had always suffered with. When he got upset he would say or do things before he thought things through. Yes, Meredith should have told him she was even trying for priority acceptance but he knew she must have put a lot of thought into it before she even applied for it. The more he thought of it, she had a valid point, it would be better and probably in the best interest if he tried to move back out west. Emma would soon be entering school and if Meredith was guaranteed internship, residency and fellowship all in the same hospital it would prevent Emma from having to make cross-country moves every three to four years. Slowly Derek lifted Meredith into his arms in hopes of not waking her. She shifted slightly but remained asleep and he carried back his room where he climbed into bed with her, holding her against his chest

"Derek?" Meredith mumbled

"Hmmm" Derek said pulling her closer to him and inhaling her lavender scent from her hair

"I'm sorry" she said half asleep

"I'm sorry too, we'll talk later" he said kissing the top of her head as they both relaxed completely for the first time that evening and fell asleep.

_I'm gonna say please, let's try to make ends meet_  
_Oh-ooh-whoa-ooh-oh-oh_  
_Tonight I'm gonna loosen things_  
_Don't play me just kiss me._

* * *

I only got one review on the last chapter so I think I'll skip the filler. Here's just the tip of the iceberg. Meredith and Derek must learn to now make decisions on not only what's in best interest of Emma but for them as a couple as well. Now they must calculate how every long term decision will affect the other.


End file.
